tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19952352723348104742024-03-13T15:35:10.694-04:00Rick Wiggins: livedeadcat pressRick Wigginshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00523692547207125395noreply@blogger.comBlogger153125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1995235272334810474.post-47038526610802689052014-09-17T12:24:00.004-04:002014-09-17T12:24:43.253-04:00ADULTS TURN TO TOY PARTIES<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">I thought
I had lost you in the storm.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">I was
afraid I had lost you<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">in a
completely different part of the lot<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">on the
totally opposite side of the mall.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">I bought
stuff I didn’t really need, AGAIN. Thinking<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">of her,
and how you forget to remind me of her.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">She
reminded me of the major year-end sale<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">of my
life, the one I still think about all the time,<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">the
infinite pull of two monsters moon docking<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">each
other in the back booth at Stuckey’s after practice.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">It hits
me mostly at night when I’m too fucked up<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">on
anxiolytic properties and alcohol machines.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">I thought
I needed her.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">you told
me I didn’t need her anymore.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">I should
just go down to the park and find someone<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">to give
it to me hard because I needed it hard.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">Run her
through a spin cycle then call the purple heart truck.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">Suddenly
I remembered every word I’d said to her<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">was total
bullshit.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">All those
things I’d ever felt about you were straight<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">total
bullshit, then I got the little man cleaned up<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">for
Sunday school.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">There
were two figures in the rain trying to walk<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">to the
porno store a block and a half or so up,<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">a tangle
of wires, massive black change-your-life<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">Cockzilla
rebuilds downtown </span><st1:city><st1:place><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">Tokyo</span></st1:place></st1:city><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">. </span><st1:city><st1:place><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">Seattle</span></st1:place></st1:city><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">can sink
or swim, yall don’t really give a fuck.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">We were
all listening to the radio,<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">you could
see it coming through the walls<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">like
Houdini, his appendix or whatever,<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">reports
of the typhoon or whatever it was then<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">turning
180-degrees on its wheelbase<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">for
another unforgettable trip to happy city!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">That was
total bullshit, asshat,<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">yah, me and
my homeys went boogie boarding<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">off the
top of the statue of liberty,<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">unmotherfuckingbelievable!
At least one of us<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">feel like
dying each time they play that mandolin.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">Like a
buzzsaw in my skull, love makes you do things<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">I would
normally handle easily with a glue gun.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">The
entire enormous bush got yanked<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">in my eye
before I had time to blink or put up<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">a new one
exactly like the original excepting memory.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">The
building was lifted slowly off its foundation,<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">flipping
around the other way, it’s another Fisher Price<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">fresh
view of the missile silos reflecting absently.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">But who
thinks ecru wainscoting and Spanish prayers<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">for
salvation on a floating armature is safer?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">a 1979
through 1989 Operation Cyclone<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">hatchback
in excellent gently driven condition<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">smashed
out the supposedly bulletproof plexiglass <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">testicles
of the pitbull, Amputee Lifeguard.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">Police
speculate it was gang related. Act Of God.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">Stand up
comedy renaissance.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">“Those
trusts have some odd balls under them.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">Witnesses
to the execution observed<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">the execution
was flawless but overall it lacked fire.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">When the
all clear was eaten by an Italianate marble<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">vestibule
where </span><st1:state><st1:place><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">Washington</span></st1:place></st1:state><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;"> had once been feted<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">to
radical temperature fluctuations and now common<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">total
fucking bullshit.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">From the
sensitive uppermost tip of the foreskin<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">rug, hand
tufted, no child labor that we’re aware of, to<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">the
unwinnable argument about GOD as all knowing all seeing<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">condiment
no more than twenty seconds long or it hardens<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">and
becomes indelicate, you can’t take it back and then oh! no!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">He will
find what he hadn’t lost.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">Is it ok
if I call you mine?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">Is it ok
to wear white to a black wedding?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">I was so
afraid.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">I was
afraid I hadn’t lost you.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">You lost
a lot of water in those first four days<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">just
incase you hadn't heard,<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">you lost a
prometheus and artemis,<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">and the
artemis was drunk as hell.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">There
isn't a particular reason why <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">I hadn't
lost my virginity until four.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">Whether
the person has passed away,<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">contact
was lost, or the strength <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">of the
mechanism was both<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">too much
and yet not enough. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">If you
hadn't taken your own life<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">I would
have taken you out for pancakes.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">When I
saw you, I was afraid to meet you...<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">When I
met you, I was afraid to kiss you...<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">When I
kissed you, I was afraid to love you...<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">Now that
I love you, I'm afraid to<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">think
you’re going to break that newborn? <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">You’re
not alone. Someone you love is addicted<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">to
abusing Journey. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">News
flash: Not having a job gives you a lot of time<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">to help
the poor, losing their balance in boats. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">Only love
is a moron gluing feathers on a flume.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">If I
hadn't lost my job in advertising<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">I never
would have lost my Virginity.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">I never
should have gone anywhere near NPR.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">I was so
afraid she’d ask me out. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">I was
afraid to have a girl, because<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">I was
afraid of worms.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">I knew
she wanted me badly enough<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">to destroy
an entire city block. Her dreams<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">of
becoming an inspirational wheelchair<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">free
success story were only realized when she<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">became a
rockstar with edema in the right foot and ankle.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">But
others, especially in the </span><st1:country-region><st1:place><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">United States</span></st1:place></st1:country-region><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">, represent<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">what
American readiness to challenge logical explanations<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">is all
about. Americans call history textbooks stumbling<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">blocks to
unity.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">Some think
that “The First Thanksgiving” wasn't really<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">a
thanksgiving, resembling a tea dance. As a matter<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">of fact
they call it “The 1621 Harvest Celebration”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">because
they agree it was more like what you might call<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">a
harvest celebration.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">Historians
call this comprehensive type of information anti-<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">systemic
data. Though none will admit to being
open<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">anti-systemites.
They just enjoy some ‘you’ time and a hot drink <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">from a
king’s head, thanks to chemistry!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">Some of
the most prized domestic teas took years<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">to
accomplish it, while others take only minutes to kill.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">This
party is made up of both varieties.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">A
female-only gathering of cannibal chieftains and their<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">sharks
where participants learn about and buy sex<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">toys is a
type of party plan similar to Tupperware<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">massacres
in prohibition, or any, era </span><st1:city><st1:place><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">Chicago</span></st1:place></st1:city><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">Watch
Bambi with a genuine sharkskin Monster Dildo,<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">our most
popular baby name for 2012.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">What does
my dream mean? <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">When cats
die do they go into hiding<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">waiting
for the chance to reorganize and recruit?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">I waited
all night outside in the storm but she never came.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">I was
afraid of that.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">Last
update ... <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">I was
afraid the Lock Nest monster (sometimes called Nesty<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">or Nest)
was not a real hokes. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">but I
don’t know what you’ve got to lose your rag about.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;"><br /></span></div>
Rick Wigginshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00523692547207125395noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1995235272334810474.post-82081087457958330262014-09-17T12:21:00.001-04:002014-09-17T12:21:46.185-04:00A WEDDING HAS OCCURRED<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">(B-</span><st1:stockticker><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">ROLL</span></st1:stockticker></b><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;"><b>)</b><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;"><b>(VO UP)</b><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">ANNCR - The
screeching subway cars collided <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">in a
tastefully understated ceremony, <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">the young
bride flying as far as a hundred<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">yards in
either direction and embedded <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">in the
tunnel walls. Some of the tile dating<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">back to
the depression era was handmade <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">by giant terminal
ants. A single ant can carry <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">an entire
show on its back despite a poorly<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">developed
script and characters. Yours<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">is the
one gay color. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;"><b>(:20
DONUT – INSERT POETRY)</b><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">When they
die they continue to sing for as long <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">as seven hours. Some things don’t need to be <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">explained,
like the meat you dream is wearing <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">your meat
tuxedo and appearing live on Access <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">Hollywood
in your place so that you can sleep <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">late in firing
position, the lazy curl of the Fosterbird’s <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">lower
abdominal piercing. African Variegated <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">Amethyst
Kidney Stone. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;"><b>(DROWNING
FX UNDER)</b><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">Let’s go
to the perineum and get the particulars from<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">animatron
Mickey Bungsplitter…<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;"> <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">“...at
two minutes thirteen seconds into the ninth, <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">winner by
technical knockout and still lighter than air <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">Unitarian
champion of Bra World:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">The Guatemalan Tungsten
Rooster, <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">Jesus
"Five Sleeping Eyes" Iglesias!!”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">(RACE
RIOT FX UP </span><st1:stockticker><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">AND</span></st1:stockticker></b><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;"><b> UNDER)</b><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">You may
blight the internal landscape with baby jam. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">I now
have the honor of presenting for the first time, <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">Mr. and
Mrs. Laugh or be Dry Brushed Celeste Velato.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">(DISSOLVE
– DRIED </span><st1:stockticker><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">BLUE</span></st1:stockticker><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;"> ANTS BEING SCATTERED ON A </span><st1:stockticker><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">BED</span></st1:stockticker><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">)<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;"><b>(FX – SEX
ON A COUPON CIRCULAR)</b><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">Some
species are known to mate for life. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">Gibbon
apes<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">wolves<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">termites<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">coyotes<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">barn owls<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">beavers<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">bald
eagles<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">golden
eagles<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">condors<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">swans<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">brolga
cranes<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">French
angel fish<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">sandhill
cranes<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">pigeons<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">prions<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">red-tailed
hawks<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">anglerfish<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">ospreys<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">prairie
voles<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">black
vultures<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">But this
couple has a thesaurus. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">(MUSIC –
Mendelssohn’s “Monthly Blood Featherer” UP </span><st1:stockticker><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">AND</span></st1:stockticker></b><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;"><b> OUT) </b><o:p></o:p></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;"><b><br /></b></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;"><b><br /></b></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;"><b><br /></b></span></div>
Rick Wigginshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00523692547207125395noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1995235272334810474.post-35261500314476475912014-09-17T12:12:00.002-04:002014-09-17T12:12:24.732-04:00FATALITY<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10.0pt;">FATALITY<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10.0pt;">tobogganing
over a transplant medalist, she hypnotizes miners <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10.0pt;">from their
trousers, teases toads into toad vessels, each a tame volvo, <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10.0pt;">when
flipped a fishcake, without the humidity to sling isotopes as rope <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10.0pt;">tricks,
molding asparagus of their rinse (saddle-sore, <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10.0pt;"> uncredentialed,<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10.0pt;">u-joints
and exciting theorem on a hair within a hair in a lunarium <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10.0pt;">in a fort)
sonneteering chrome seals, the heaviest reborn moose hits the silk <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10.0pt;">first, all
wrists of digits in the eye to lick, it’s that adenoidal nexus, Al, that <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10.0pt;">cannot
modify pain or fullness or co-star with Minutemen in orifices, eat <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10.0pt;">Vitamin
Water and you’re back! Nazi cycles of the Who Shoved Thor winning <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10.0pt;">a cake in
the Tower-de-Prance, always in season, never an ally, alivest where <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10.0pt;">they deaden
deeper trim, carbomber makes Louis Lopez the Cali Kid <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10.0pt;"> swizzle, he
being that ornate—<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10.0pt;">a
seamstress moiré on the goddaughter in too far to itself (it has those <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10.0pt;">eater
layers) a Satyr’s Miata of strenuously polygonal pacifiers, gone yogic <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10.0pt;">sending
into the slit (a whimperer) now I go arrowing you in a kibbitz I wanted mis-<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10.0pt;">spelling
itself to afford gangrene-- this is the feel of the dome removed and still <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10.0pt;">the sky has
a magnifier. This is the shenanigan of snakebird. He brings his own bin, <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10.0pt;">gets what
they opine. Parochially so special, only maybe four are polyvalent. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10.0pt;">The
enchanter viscid as unlined stomach skin, yellowish powder at range. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10.0pt;">What you
deliver is to be changed. Unless a new
rule is messier. And cans of April <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 1.0in; text-indent: .5in;">
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10.0pt;">fistula by the goal. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10.0pt;">Goalless but
artificial enough for heterotrophy, magnets in pairs of one. So this <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10.0pt;">placenta a
witch intuited gawks itself, plunks good cash on a cardigan, offers <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10.0pt;">perpetual
lube but refuses to duel on the common, more of the aftershocks of biceps<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10.0pt;">not where
she thought she left them, under the keys to the Dreft. At Coal-Black <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10.0pt;">an’ de
Pulverizer’s prizes they hurled a serenade in two cats. Deppity Short <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10.0pt;">and his
band of the bed retired, pumpkin of touch-type salad, it stresses <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10.0pt;">an
unbeknownst bull’s eye on the porch, just as Itchy is the Japanese for Trout, <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10.0pt;">in an
insularism like a Methodist in a tryst with Thaddeus Rex, friend to dinosaurs <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10.0pt;">in
Wapakoneta. This, this is what I salaam
too pronto, coffee nostalgia, this non- <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10.0pt;">refundable
pulse. And if I eat stake, gastrosplinters make me headmaster? Kick me, <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10.0pt;">I was
slouched like lilies, pasties drizzled on a Gorgon comma nothing. It was honor-<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10.0pt;">able the
popsicle I did. I eat rosin deliberately to set the clock. In inertness I am
veggie <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10.0pt;">sandwich to
go and I can no longer avert my imperial cervix. bitchslap on the one <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 10.0pt;">to this.
bar-b-cue. It is a delimited altoid spoilt on my pelt. mallwork: spoon time.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
Rick Wigginshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00523692547207125395noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1995235272334810474.post-23007533364438413712014-09-17T12:08:00.001-04:002014-09-17T12:08:48.201-04:00A TERM IS A DIVISION<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;"><br />
I know I’m not the Emily Dickinson of poetry but<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">I hate
poetry; even the 1% that doesn't suck <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">as much
as the camera inside it. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">I can
recall only two poems that I've actually ever really liked<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">(Muskrat
Love and Commercial Trash Dumpsters).<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">1 Star 2
Stars 3 Stars 4 Stars 5 Stars<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">without
the tears this is so where I am. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">...just
sayin'<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">I'm a
little confused... <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">you use
some phrases that are a little akward...like<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">At the
last minute a word is waiting<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">for
another application to complete.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">I deny
all technology but my comp<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">and this
poem sucks like monkey butts,<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">keep
working on it and work on your self-esteme too.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">So what
if it's difficult; writing with your feet is difficult<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">This
doesn't suck exactly but it is confusing and random,<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">make it
sound like something a person might say <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">not heard
that way before and not to be<br />
<!--[if !supportLineBreakNewLine]--><br />
<!--[endif]--><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">something
that rhymed but didn't suck:)<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">Have
someone else who isn't your best friend <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">just say
it already, we’re dying here.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">And the
basic principle is – <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">the less
you understand it; the better it is for all of us.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">The
better it looks, the better it sells. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">Kind of
like modern art:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">The
better you solder it, the better it works.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">Songs are
better than poems, but for me <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">only
because of the music part. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">No amount
of prep will matter or be<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">repeated
or ever be remembered<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">because
you will see the signs and leave<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">when
someone mentions Black Veil Brides <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">in an
everyday conversation. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">When you
understand how to apply <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">the
principals of hypnosis <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">in an
everyday conversation, <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">you will
become a master of influence <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">and one
of the most powerful one billion <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">teenage
poets in the world. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">Can you
answer this question? <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">Would you
use the word caveat<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">in an
everyday conversation?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">It is still
shocking, though, to hear <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">a little
nine year-old girl say, "Asshole" <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">or
"Goddamnit" or "fuck" or one of the other<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">four
words of worship,<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">one that
always had been a household word<br />
<!--[if !supportLineBreakNewLine]--><br />
<!--[endif]--><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">like poet
lariat or televised hanging<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">used in
speaking of the ordinary.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">i guess it
worked. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;"><br />
face to face is best I think, for
anythings, <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">everyday
recurrences of living <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">in a hole
in the ground with<br />
<!--[if !supportLineBreakNewLine]--><br />
<!--[endif]--><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">someone
else who isn't your best friend, <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">not newly
chosen or long considered <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">among the
most revered of contemporary writers, <br />
<!--[if !supportLineBreakNewLine]--><br />
<!--[endif]--><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">the grand
blessing of life, the basis of every virtue.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">How long
is a baby considered a newborn?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">Or a
matter for comment afterward?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">Read your
poetry back to you and ask yourself <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;"><br />
Holy shit, I’m an Indie Motherfucker!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">Who would
ever have thought it was the one<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">telltale
sign of grout erosion due to leakage. See<br />
<!--[if !supportLineBreakNewLine]--><br />
<!--[endif]--><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">if it
sounds natural, and if it doesn't, how you could <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">fuck with
their heads, messing with the<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">saying
itself from the beginning through<br />
<!--[if !supportLineBreakNewLine]--><br />
<!--[endif]--><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">the scene
featuring the destruction of the green<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">planet by
powerful subsonic waves.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">An
interesting way to get people to read it,<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">I guess I
just wanted to see if I could write<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">in time
to the words.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">All its
uses and circumstances to<br />
<!--[if !supportLineBreakNewLine]--><br />
<!--[endif]--><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">donate
for a substantial write-off, ask one of the Nuns to<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">read your
poetry back to you and ask yourself <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">am I the
writer I want the world to think I am, or can I<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">win big
at the poker table! Or take a chance, go
all-in, and<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">utter at
last that meaning of its own<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">“I Can’t
Believe it’s NOT EVEN Not Butter!” GOD!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;"><br />
for which it had long been the only word<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;"><br />
you have previously suggested here.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">though it
seems now that any word would do<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">shitty
poetry isn't defined yet.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;"><i>Well my
peotry got published so mine is good</i><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">and i
want to see your lips move <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">with over
thirty books of poetry <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">it's depressing
to see so many people <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 10.0pt;">waste so
much time on being...INTERESTING.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
Rick Wigginshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00523692547207125395noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1995235272334810474.post-61244240412547638492012-03-30T01:09:00.002-04:002012-03-30T01:24:17.083-04:00NOW ENTERING MANUAL BREATHING MODE<br />
The night's work was over.<br />
Most of the workers sensed the real life.<br />
One could not embrace the intention<br />
of the heroes. Next day, no scooter.<br />
<br />
So the whole craze about the artist<br />
went over his head, since he fell asleep<br />
half way through the predictable plot.<br />
Then came the planes and swiffers.<br />
<br />
Danny DeVito waited in the baggage
claim<br />
with a sign that said "DeVito".<br />
He was clinging firmly to his coke zero.<br />
It only showed in a single frame.<br />
<br />
"I'll be right back" everyone<br />
in the world said to the space station.<br />
"I mean, who doesn't want to be velvety-<br />
rich!" said the station master's buttered nuts.<br />
<br />
That seemed weird, the way she drowned<br />
before that movie began. Anti-anti-climactic.<br />
This is how revolutions are fomented. One<br />
pint of blood on a corn muffin at a time.<br />
<br />
Now the internet is turning young girls into living<br />
conditions, staring doe-eyed at the waving crop<br />
of yellow bonanzas, wielding butterfly bows,
cupie<br />
lips on porcelain denoted by black hail.<br />
<br />
One gave his last muffin to a young girl<br />
and she played flight of the bumblebee<br />
with a butter knife crusted in his precious nuts.<br />
The red balloons aka her muffin will not be televised.<br />
<br />
Hey you! you got white stuff in your hair!<br />
Is this product placement? Too much white
product?<br />
Was it what you expected? How
do you get that white<br />
stuff off your tongue?<br />
<br />
"I'll be right back," his wind rattled.<br />
The construction site had a bright banner<br />
that made it an exiting construction site!<br />
That eight foot ball of filling blood was answered<br />
<br />
with a meteor, with a fire safety manager,<br />
with a portable in-ear war thermometer,<br />
with grease to prevent the dance floor<br />
from rising into a cavern of its scars.<br />
<br />
The pod, when they blew it open, was filled<br />
with the most beautiful sounds. Sounds
of<br />
rejected sinks. Laughter of retards writing<br />
all of Mozart then playing with C-4 and a Colt<br />
<br />
45 Malt Liquor and a 45-rpm of Mozart "handling"<br />
himself in a tricky situation involving blacks. The blacks<br />
don't care about tongues. They're just tongues.<br />
You trade one in at the clinic for a real-life Barbie<br />
<br />
then you bow her until she breaks out<br />
in Keep the Home Fires Burning.<br />
Love at eleven compromised the plaster<br />
looking like striations of Acai juice or invented blood.<br />
<br />
The blood squeezed out of a Plymouth.<br />
C-4
requires a binder to work. Something to bind it<br />
to work. The Cars That Ate Paris released in the US<br />
as the cars that eat people. But ya gotta drive.<br />
<br />
In space no revolution is possible without corn.<br />
In space no young girl can be sexualized until she's a doll.<br />
In space no amount of blood can fill any ball.<br />
In space no one can hear you bathe your eyes.<br />
<br />
No one ever hears Mr. Bubble coming until someone<br />
loses
an eye. The teacher with the ruler with the metal edge<br />
bought us one nut each then left us to get home on our own.<br />
The ending ran backwards before the opening credits.<br />
<br />
It blew. Hitchcock walked.
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />Rick Wigginshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00523692547207125395noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1995235272334810474.post-14806364716829841492012-03-07T16:14:00.000-05:002012-03-07T16:14:42.777-05:00You Are Not a Boy<br><br />
You are not a boy but pimples don’t let you live free? <br />
in glad tidings we greet thee oh Roosevelt of the coal chute,<br />
and surmise that Satan’s scowl has deepened your butt crack. <br />
Deepened the tub to accommodate same, deprogrammed all<br />
your independent swing dancers, daughters of the Reddy Kilowat<br />
forgetting generation, but me. me? me, say, how dare he play with us?<br />
Work for your supper while recognizing the kitchen of our Slavic<br />
youth, recognize its brilliance in Spics, Sambo. <br />
Abortion Clinic Length Fuse Deluxe by Hasbro. <br />
<br />
Patrick, Are you ready to please your BFF on Valentines?<br />
How about your BBF? Your big feinting cork on the wall? <br />
Need expert consultation with your cork control?<br />
Gain some extra strength and be ready to become <br />
an advancing army of the red state sexmachine!<br />
<br />
Real Estate Sex with a real Realtor <br />
who’s never had sex till this very moment<br />
in the suspension of quality time. Sex After 50 <br />
is the new Sex after miles to the border on foot. <br />
No Piranhas, no noblese oblige, no blems <br />
in your finish – Earl Scheib. <br />
You must use your my First Utero Creamsicle <br />
by Fisher Price, loaded with warm hot big huge hard stiff <br />
loads of compassion by the Helsinki Vicodin Quartet, an agrarian<br />
age without the required Evinrude Human Resources Tennis Prrrrrrro.<br />
<br />
Their eyes dropped onto the table a short while after.<br />
<br />
Against that wall of on-demand binding <br />
riddling the whole Heidelberg inquisition <br />
with Stephen King on bass, rendering Tuesdays <br />
With Maury in potato buds, the undead as a Nazi <br />
mosquito brigade advancing on the crowds in Fireplace City.<br />
<br />
Flattens his tongue on that sphere,<br />
skull fragment cocked in a quizzical dog<br />
attitude, he presses an alphabet into her<br />
until an accessory has been born and sucked <br />
its contents dry for trying tofu made of veal.<br />
<br />
Pequod over the netting of the Juliette <br />
of the Sportscenter Central West, trapped <br />
at the mouth of the pass and all that harderer. <br />
Arnold gave his life to golf, it just won’t end yet. <br />
Give of me my cold, my hungry, my thin pleasure <br />
found in boards unshuffled upon on the quarterdeck, <br />
the Enterprise was destroyed before any of us were born <br />
singing, destroyed by the evil that lurks in the hearts of men…<br />
destroyed like so many eggs and ham (not any known shade <br />
of green) Then the Pleasure of nice weather no longer rhymes. <br />
Just like it never did. <br />
Question: to every black man who dreams of a white woman in his bed, <br />
would you elect this Cadbury Goat? Question: to every god feigning man <br />
who rides a white horse in his F-150 with stretch cab, would you? <br />
Engineering types the casing took on the look of told us what we needed <br />
to know; man is a chameleon with only one color and pattern to his name. <br />
The promise is not Das Kapital with Johnny Action by Marx. (it must be <br />
good, it’s by Marx!) The problem is in your radiator cap too willing to blow <br />
for just overheating on the pledge drive. <br />
<br />
ones weight exists to enter it in the contest to not lose faith.<br />
<br />
I can devise work on my palm.<br />
<br />
Get ready with the I in I am about to be <br />
Going Easy And Swift With U-Boats Up the Canal. <br />
And see, you step into the prescription canal<br />
and find it made of oil. Oil and the gel of the Alleghany buck. <br />
<br />
Make sure they think you were in the freezer when the deal<br />
went down, then take a cab over to Morgana and get busy<br />
going down on Morgana’s miniature Italian greyhound.<br />
<br />
The kids knew only its initial properties and killed it for meat.<br />
In that forest of beers and subjects under torture yet there was<br />
nothing more that needed to be entered into the official report.<br />
<br />
<br />
What Is New Jew? Jew, If nothing becomes you <br />
but the black dress of the hologram, how does that <br />
set on tilt the world of anesthesia? There’s a second <br />
world of anesthesia? Hiding beneath the bed of the first?<br />
Stabbing me in the back at the slippery lipped source<br />
of all life slopping its intoxicating smelling chili.<br />
It was/is life, what he said she said about you, not yours <br />
to take back for credit. That portal into the entrance <br />
lobby, that eight to ten inch causeway, spread <br />
its chili across his back and down. <br />
If he had been a better sci-fi writer he might have<br />
left a better will. <br />
Seriously. <br />
And he might have gotten the chance to direct.<br />
<br />
How Often Do You Feel Blue? <br />
Maybe it's your unrecognized depression?<br />
Maybe the too many ess’s in your name? <br />
Two sons who, nobly following in his footsteps, have taken <br />
to reciting, like cloning chimpanzees, the prefatory<br />
negation of all things unrelated to A True Story <br />
About Thee Gods Of Love And Their Mastery<br />
of shipments of primo weed unpacked on the tarmac <br />
of the curve of your lower spine. <br />
This was of course impossible without delay.<br />
Boloney, Febreze, sequential sentient ants traipsing <br />
their way to the islands where they roosted, <br />
or soaring leisurely to Simply Order Top Quality Generic Pills <br />
scattered to the cloud of bees. The bees know. The bees<br />
don’t tell, it’s how they preserve their information sources. <br />
Balancing death by Nestles Crunch on rope, on bridge, on<br />
Poison, on Blitzen, on a snack assortment that was heavenly,<br />
the stuff of a hundred million gleaming nightmare hooks and ladders.<br />
The nest spontaneously feathering. <br />
Cradling it on its side, feigning mesothelioma <br />
when the plasterers union finishes up stuccoing Lincoln’s eye. <br />
Anything, they’d have done anything, just so the holograph <br />
wouldn’t have taken any shit.<br />
<br />
Or taken any away.<br />
<br />
One was large as a tong. <br />
One, a familiar tune.<br />
<br />
Shocking results on your body regeneration search <br />
taught even a woman at the information meat counter<br />
that nothing would nestle not holographically fizzure imbued.<br />
Not, at least, until after they snatched her anyway and reexamined<br />
and retitled and rebranded and reintroduced the same hole<br />
into the same receiving line. The bride bled water from her seat.<br />
Was I going to die when released from the trap?<br />
I was going to continue to die trapped.<br />
They clapped for themselves, so I clapped. <br />
<br><br>Rick Wigginshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00523692547207125395noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1995235272334810474.post-75202635698944241572012-03-07T15:29:00.000-05:002012-03-07T15:29:07.191-05:00StuntHope<br><br />
What does it mean when your baby Is born <br />
with Blonde Streaks? I don't know, but my daughter <br />
was born with the longest consecutive win streak in NFL history.<br />
<br />
Some of them bear the silvery streaks of birth. <br />
<br />
Mini cunt lice has a spectacular aura<br />
(another more detailed examination to follow)<br />
but he wants me to flower it in my tent<br />
so he can have a bonsai bud.<br />
<br />
We’re so good together<br />
I have to cling to him until the panic subsides<br />
but who here is hazardously wearing their fatigue?<br />
at most it’s a numerosity, a gasket, momentary<br />
disarray, a carry-on cot in the already Radon fuselage.<br />
<br />
So I stick to misspelling words like “Organising” <br />
and sucking the monsoons out of parties<br />
posing fetchingly as Larva Croft by a fence.<br />
Free-style dancing across soundproof pleats<br />
in my silvery-streaked burn-scarred nickelplated nickels.<br />
<br />
My son wants me to legalize his bronchitis. I said sure.<br />
His dad is an autocratic friend of my enemy friend. <br />
Am I milling correctly? Is this the pre-debris-trail-plane?<br />
Cassocked johns are dancing, free-style, around <br />
my titanic hairball roadside mausoleum. It’s real,<br />
my titanic, and the choke response, and the resurrection.<br />
It’s you who’s the display case. <br />
<br><br>Rick Wigginshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00523692547207125395noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1995235272334810474.post-39430079166377255992012-01-27T21:21:00.000-05:002012-01-27T21:21:05.423-05:00a CRUX a KLUX some CLIQUES<br> <br />
Give me one full ridicule example<br />
using the regular baby as a bar.<br />
Give me a newborn reflex action.<br />
Give me a pregnancy AND a baby.<br />
Give me one regular with grief<br />
and one regular hold the grief. <br />
Extra reflexes on both.<br />
And one medium soft target. <br />
And one water, no cup. <br />
<br />
Grief is really just relief with a g<br />
where the l used to be. Or closer. <br />
Or less close. <br />
And some redeployment. <br />
The hilarious phases of pain. <br />
Phase of the moon as the shape<br />
of the elegant burn on your calf. <br />
Happy Reenactment Day, baby.<br />
Name your pie. <br />
<br />
I took the Ell once. <br />
It was in Chicago. <br />
They made me give it back. <br />
<br />
I threw out my back in Chicago. <br />
It was opening day. <br />
The ball never reached the plate.<br />
The spork was on permanent backorder.<br />
<br />
When I swapped the New York City skyline<br />
for a sandwich sliced like dinosaur teeth<br />
everybody died. Not the least being me. <br />
The least being all of the senseless fucking<br />
dinosaurs at once. Who saw that coming? <br />
Kraft?<br />
<br />
When you say you are willing<br />
to give your life do you mean<br />
the kind of thing that men are<br />
afraid or ashamed to do openly,<br />
and by day? How much are you<br />
asking for the histories?<br />
The ones that are over<br />
on that table by the hose reel. <br />
Which do you think suits me best? The green? <br />
Will you take less?<br />
<br />
Jesus said “Let the least of you<br />
dinosaurs come unto me. <br />
I’ve got the only ball. It’s my mother<br />
scratching party now.” <br />
That was back in the summer of ’65. <br />
Whichever hundred and sixty five.<br />
Later he revised his position.<br />
More sandwiches for the crew.<br />
Fewer fossils per capita.<br />
<br />
So, aside from everything else, Mrs. Lincoln<br />
MKZ, how do you like Detroit? <br />
<br />
There goes that slow, exquisite build. <br />
The ball moves faster than the heart.<br />
<br />
They buried him then hung him next day. <br />
He got himself hung however. <br />
Does the order of events, ultimately,<br />
have any impact on the events themselves? <br />
Did The Great One need that last goal?<br />
If his supermodel wife were to die<br />
of a mysterious kitchen utensil<br />
tomorrow would he need another? <br />
Would he shave?<br />
<br />
Here comes the show down. <br />
The beating faster heart gives up<br />
entirely before it’s reduced to a lousy<br />
recessive pulse in an identical<br />
though somewhat smaller scaled shaft.<br />
<br />
I won one off of Kevin Grabasski at recess. <br />
Was he pissed. <br />
<br />
The distortion, the machine<br />
that produces the sole<br />
supply of large jungle cats.<br />
The distortion is in fact<br />
an intentional distraction<br />
from the gathering moisture<br />
on your thigh. I still love that one. <br />
It hurt me so I couldn’t forget a thing. <br />
Similar in style to the split between<br />
tracks that were originally joined<br />
in memory, divided<br />
by trains, then by numbers<br />
in a list, then by whatever<br />
you say next.<br />
<br />
I remember this song as the first song<br />
of the best show I’ve ever<br />
died a thousand times.<br />
<br />
By this time next year sex will<br />
have become all you ever needed.<br />
<br />
I always try too hard, like a blue reindeer. <br />
Like a lone blue reindeer in JANUARY.<br />
<br />
Remember Janet Jackson’s titty<br />
holding court? The only manmade thing<br />
you can see from space?<br />
<br />
Now we talk in terms<br />
of orchestral arrangements<br />
of various inedible geniuses. <br />
<br />
No, we don’t. <br />
We don’t talk at all. <br />
Not at all. <br />
We just repeat what he said.<br />
<br />
A smile, is it? A record<br />
shattering dry spell<br />
with only a classic iPod<br />
to loosely date this moment<br />
of dreamy<br />
catastrophe.<br />
<br />
There was, seriously, nothing<br />
funny about that first date. <br />
It was perfectly quiet. <br />
We had carrots. <br />
We spoke via body language. <br />
Now I no longer know<br />
which season is longer,<br />
the snow season<br />
or the season<br />
with the missing snow. <br />
<br />
I’m still quoting lyrics<br />
to try to win a woman’s affection<br />
or win a man’s rejection of a woman<br />
affecting an attitude of musicality<br />
in an upward firing bat tornado. <br />
Neither one makes sufficiently<br />
little sense.<br />
<br />
Do you think you’re a dinosaur? <br />
Do you think I am in need of assistance? <br />
Just because I am saying goodbye<br />
with my mouth while my words are<br />
saying play me some loopy fiasco?<br />
<br />
Their sense of dusk is uncanny. <br />
That bridge is the last thing standing<br />
between us and them. Between this<br />
lunch and some sort of duck embryo<br />
delicacy you might find<br />
in the back pocket of any seven year old<br />
attached to her rising market share<br />
by a neo-classic iPod. <br />
<br />
I have a new girlfriend I’d like you to<br />
be. Stay right here, I’ll bring her over.<br />
<br><br>Rick Wigginshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00523692547207125395noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1995235272334810474.post-42438539162964854812011-11-30T17:13:00.000-05:002011-11-30T17:13:13.047-05:00BulkNuts<br><br />
<br />
<b>Listen to Me</b><br />
<br />
Before becoming something I can put in a can and sell to myself at cost<br />
please read the "You should defile me if" section at the bottom of my auto-<br />
erotic snake aquarium. <br />
<br />
And while we’re pleasing me…<br />
<br />
Please demoralize the grass under my anus as I’m slipping a finger anywhere<br />
but where you think I’m thinking of slipping a finger. Then take your sin<br />
and silence it, you amplified falsehood. It’s my obesity, they’re my glaciers<br />
and I can see for miles and miles and miles and there’s nothing for miles and miles <br />
and miles. The demoralization has to do with confirming a theory I’ve had since <br />
the day we met, roughly three months from “gentlemen, synchronize your analytically <br />
alien itsy anal probe watchdogs starting the second before…now.” <br />
<br />
<b>No, Seriously, Listen to ME</b><br />
<br />
Did you know that the same chemical that’s released AFTER you have sex <br />
is also released AFTER you have sex with a dog? And that the dog understands<br />
this fact? And pretends to enjoy it? Did you know that thousands of dogs<br />
in the same mass grave can read the word “defilement” and each come up<br />
for air at a completely different moment? AND ALL the males will be immaculately<br />
neutered? The females, of course, will be sprayed. And pretend to enjoy it. <br />
But only six, naturally selected, like, by nature, will be wearing my logo thumb-<br />
screws. And that’s how I decided to be a psychic on TV. It beats doing squats.<br />
<br />
Here’s a poem I wrote to make men (people, too) want to fuck some of me:<br />
<br />
you are indirect, a thinness <br />
at a mid-sized squat station<br />
chosen by your peers to die<br />
unshod. my inclination, though, <br />
is to paraphrase Isis, <br />
“I am my mime, as much as my mime is me.” <br />
consciousness, another word <br />
for sulking, sulking another word <br />
for slut, megawatt. I rule my realm <br />
with a lamented malted hoovered <br />
down too fast for the guilt to attain <br />
maximum entropy. time for a breaky. <br />
kiss kiss. arthur is rimming my doorbell.<br />
<br />
(I love how “megawatt” fits right in there<br />
like it was made for the job. now I just<br />
have to remember what the job was.)<br />
<br />
<b>Now Hear Me!</b><br />
<br />
OXYCONTIN! That’s that sex dog hormone stuff! <br />
So, I’m all about writing about things. <br />
and noticing how many dogs within a 20 mile radius <br />
are secretly (or not so secretly) thinking about releasing<br />
theirs on me and pointing it out in the media. <br />
<br />
Finding a dress that intends to look like a puptent. <br />
Finding a coat that makes me look complex, long, located. <br />
Eating the most ants at the family picnic. <br />
Eating the most garishly decorated spring-roll<br />
at the family picnic then crushing one off the high board <br />
to the song I want to avoid getting married to. <br />
I laicized a priest once before realizing what it meant.<br />
Twice, actually. <br />
Did I say spring-mattress? I meant hold still while I do my finger-roll. <br />
Running my sipper straight through the dreams of your switches. <br />
I did read a poem, once, see? <br />
Now I’m going to have a three-way with some dogs<br />
and a fresh batch of leeks. <br />
Feel sorry for me, don’t feel sorry for them. I love leeks. <br />
<br />
Headwear: there’s a question. I just bleed at the hair when it rains. <br />
<br />
Then I appreciate windows that have never opened.<br />
So, now, do I do more than just correlate you with my icecap? <br />
Or do you covet my leek? <br />
I’m constantly running just ahead of heavily armed appraisers.<br />
My biggest Asset (get it?) is this Sikorsky six seater Valium. <br />
Second biggest is my dreamless patchwork gayness. <br />
Third is my static Valium with patchwork gays removed<br />
and replaced by dreams that consist entirely of black sleep <br />
margins. I’ve written, among one other thing, a treatise<br />
on cooperating with trees that don’t elect to cooperate with <br />
my Assets. Then I patchwork them.<br />
<br />
<b>What Do You Hear? Do You Hear Me?</b><br />
<br />
Hear my hair being red. <br />
Listen to the rustle of my smile. <br />
My unsoundable carbon. <br />
My grin doctor. <br />
That poem I said was the essence<br />
of summertime but I am a platypus <br />
deputy gringo grinding away to bum <br />
your piddling melody plow? <br />
My pre-stung allergy? <br />
The cello I gave to a bum <br />
to horn in on your theory of air<br />
in the skulls of the Yucatan, where <br />
every man who’s a male is also a male<br />
anal despoiler?<br />
<br />
My sleeping soundly. <br />
My termination of your dream. <br />
The fumble that I am gathering<br />
on a run toward the mile marker? <br />
With a spitwad beneath my skunk flower? <br />
I bit that bee that he might be a lens<br />
through to the minus column <br />
in your undreamt of insinuations. <br />
I left my original misgivings at an alternative<br />
country gig, hoping to tease their skulls<br />
back to the Yucatan to finish my great<br />
American navel.<br />
So I got thwarted. I’m not finite. <br />
I’m just your current issue of Paranoid Times<br />
shoved under the smoke door. <br />
<br />
<b>We All Love the Music of Me!</b><br />
<br />
For Christ’s sake somebody get me a catamite!<br />
Or any silly formulaic defect I can show to the board of directors. <br />
Books are bullshit unless written at night while I’m sucking on…oh, forget it. <br />
I’ll suck on just about anything. Especially a symbol. Most especially a symbolist.<br />
My favorite symbolist is Efrem Zimbalist. Junior. <br />
<br />
<b>Watch Me Think!</b><br />
<br />
Why does every man my age seem to want to spackle my stone-<br />
dead tail to his wand like it’s some kind of medal sport? <br />
Why are there so many psychiatrist babies? <br />
And why do they all sit cross-legged<br />
when beating me at “Who Can Lose More Interest in Biography?” <br />
It’s all so slender, isn’t it? <br />
So airily slender? <br />
Cruel, in a way, but still capable <br />
of creating a foremost vodka. <br />
A mission to set fire to another agent’s mission. <br />
Terribly slender and sad. <br />
Like babies. <br />
Like yesterday. <br />
Like a twit. <br />
<br />
Then a gust of availability blows all your dayglo babies sky-high. <br />
Does that veal you can drink indispose you? It seems my approaching <br />
seems to cream to the sight of you riding me like a draft, like kippers<br />
in heat, breast-deep and born to swoon. I pretend otherwise but I don’t<br />
know how to lay. At least not how to lay a PEZ dispenser of Charlie Tuna.<br />
This begins to feel like a charity ball for the disabled baby shithead you<br />
as opposed to the jollier you I automated in my blog monkey’s anus. <br />
There’s a breeziness about it all.<br />
<br />
In steerage the Jews lost many of their numbers across the wide ocean. <br />
Why should that make me feel jawless? Why thresh about it? <br />
My fleetness of anus seems to have taken the wind out of your sling.<br />
This brings me back to the militarization of babies. <br />
To the tenses I prefer in the rain. The taint of the rain is fruitful. <br />
Let those babies leaf through my portfolio. Let them become Germans<br />
with thumb-screw patents pending. I’ll never be late for that dance. <br />
I’m a specter, an inspector, an open but off limits sphincter, like you<br />
need to visualize a velvet rope or electric fence. In the rain. <br />
<br />
You’ve got fins, learn how to stop using them. <br />
<br />
<b>Quit Watching Me Long Enough to Listen, This is Good</b><br />
<br />
I wrote a story once about how you petted a polecat. <br />
You were very pretty. I threw you into a pit. <br />
It was amorous. I wanted to see you suffocate<br />
in the Antarctic with your suffocation serum <br />
just out of reach of your cane. <br />
I bought you a Persian lilac. <br />
I threw you to Prussians. <br />
I tore off your Prussian Disguise goggles<br />
and sent you to Atlanta to serve out the rest<br />
of the season in the minors. <br />
I did a miner once. He liked it like they all do. <br />
Like a pity. Like the foodless. Like my figment<br />
turning to ink. The seizure you mistake<br />
for a caesura because you know there is no such thing. <br />
It irks me when you know anything so I send you<br />
to the Angela Davis Advisory Board for epic pity<br />
and to be sloppily sodomized by those who’ve <br />
sloppily sodomized me in my dreams. <br />
It always happens under an overpass next to a salvage yard. <br />
The killers drink tea then decapitate an advertising exec. <br />
This is usually the point at which I begin streaming. <br />
You just sit there.<br />
<br />
Now that you’ve heard my story, <br />
now that you’ve herded my tail, <br />
you turn into a random static pattern <br />
that defies itself amorously. <br />
It wears a fat suit of perfect flannel <br />
and slaps me as if I were young.<br />
You, meanwhile just sit there, jubilant, <br />
thriving in flannel, dashing off poems <br />
of anything happening anywhere <br />
there’s a threatening metal Yoda. <br />
The tension is spooky but you <br />
fine-tune me until I misperceive <br />
a gimp as a potential teammate <br />
and stick my stems in a threaded jar<br />
then flick boogers at your happy meal <br />
with the veal shake. <br />
The frostiness is almost funny but <br />
it bothers me and has since I was<br />
sodomized in a frosted vase by <br />
Mayor McCheese, he’s a man too. <br />
All men like you are specifiable <br />
by the silver in your kill scopes.<br />
Now you’ve gotten up under me again. <br />
Now I think I’ll grab a TV dinner made of <br />
actual TV’s and eat them like I used to <br />
when I was never a teenager, examining <br />
each individual sliver of glass to see<br />
if it shows any signs of having sent <br />
a happy birthday satchel bomb<br />
to my anus. <br />
(A girl can dream. But a girl is another story.) <br />
<br><br>Rick Wigginshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00523692547207125395noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1995235272334810474.post-5620899405448743692011-11-13T02:03:00.000-05:002011-11-13T02:03:50.775-05:00HOW SCIENTISTS WEED OUT WAFFLES<br><br />
My wife tried to make you a hurricane pancake, <br />
but I think it just looks like meatwad dancing. <br />
Dancing is forbidden. Blueberry eyes that cannot see <br />
are not eyes even symbolically, they’re adorable slut wear. <br />
<br />
Bless her heart, those plates are hideous. <br />
Morning laughing fishes hideous, to get the troop<br />
ships to look like a chicken trying to escape.<br />
The road is precisely a step too wide. <br />
<br />
This plate is Finnish design: Arabia’s Paralysis<br />
(Paradise in English) Yes, Finns are coma crazy.<br />
Once you reach a certain wife level there, you stop wifeling. <br />
Just take up your maps and go home to the crab boat. <br />
<br />
The pig has stopped breathing. But not shaking. <br />
Once broken apart it is embarrassing to reassemble<br />
the pig in view of a public that wants more heat, more noise. <br />
Pigs are doing their duty. Who told them what that looked like? <br />
<br />
Forgive that pun, I was overcome by your pancakes, sir. <br />
I think your wife is trying to distract you from the mixed <br />
breed strychnine diet she’s putting you on. Look to it. <br />
There might be a book there. <br />
<br />
Ice on my fingers and my toys, and I’m a Taurus! Jesus!<br />
Dancing is stupid. I would say re-wife her but the ship is too <br />
confused, the world has the same plates as my childhood. <br />
My entire relationship with my plinth has been based in lies.<br />
<br />
Flexing sun pancake thing showing off its “OH face”.<br />
Do I look professional? (shakes out hair)<br />
That dishware makes me want to slap you<br />
into a sex retreat for spectrum couples. <br />
<br />
I want Goliath to slap you now. With a wind<br />
that starts out still and splits into various hurricanes <br />
with drumsticks, taffy and sleeping jerks.<br />
Insert a celebrity name-drop here, I’m bored with it. <br />
<br />
Give his boat chocolate chip eyes, give the sand<br />
a carpet of marshmallow anus. Large pile of mustard. <br />
Meatwad wants a stupid turkey to slap back that chorus for him. <br />
Meatloaf for dinner music again. This is every man’s lot. <br />
<br />
It’s the path that’s laughing, the voteups get the money, the bitches,<br />
the hour is the same hour as the wisdom of drivin’ in my car.<br />
Something else is pounding. Something else standing. <br />
A black cloud on the horizon. Burnt flannel batter. Grunge-ola. <br />
<br />
Here’s a fruit roll-up. I was gonna make you a casserole <br />
for your loss, but uh, but, I didn’t. A no eyed girl is waltzing, <br />
whispering “Porky…” to the potted miracle product. <br />
Genderless creamy pink puke that spreads like ham-like food. <br />
<br />
Huddled in long black coat, low drawn hat, disfigurement. <br />
Probably himself. Wanting to eat himself. <br />
After eating those (cellophane) feedercakes.<br />
You should have seen the 9/11 french toast sticks. <br />
<br />
A noise like a boot coming out of a bucket of cum. <br />
Suddenly…propeller. <br />
I have to admit, I did have fun <br />
trying to put the chicken back together. <br />
<br />
Now go home and wait forever for it. <br />
<br />
Postscript:<br />
when a hurricane pancakes over a church<br />
it’s a government sanctioned form of incest.<br />
When a pancake forms a close cropped afro<br />
over a whorehouse fronted by the Pelletier Touch-<br />
<br />
Free Carwash in Pelletier, VT, it’s breakfast<br />
for non-poets with ID, eggs your style with choice <br />
of two bacon strips, sausage patties or links and two silver<br />
dollar buttermilk handjobs. (pork based death cycle on request) <br />
<br />
The Pelletier Touchfree Carwash is technically<br />
in Barre. Possibly how they get away with <br />
the fuck yourself empty here signage. <br />
Possibly money has changed hands under the booth. <br />
<br />
We thought it was a sense of place in time, but weather <br />
is the clue we’ve been missing all along. Preferably weather <br />
outside. Something with a temp and breathable in the minute <br />
before the mushroom cloud pancakes over the Pellitier <br />
<br />
psychiatric hospital in Waterbury. <br />
It’s always obvious, in front of your face, always <br />
the nose right over your thing. <br />
And I am a big nose man. <br />
<br><br>Rick Wigginshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00523692547207125395noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1995235272334810474.post-70829355901754712132011-11-06T03:32:00.000-05:002011-11-06T04:32:53.302-05:00LeMorteD’Liza<br><br />
I have the feeling that nobody will ever notice me. <br />
But I have a compliment for my haircut.<br />
I read it on my zoological chart<br />
when the turban wasn’t attending to my triceps.<br />
I saw where he wrote “whatnot” about my cupcakes.<br />
I learned what it meant by not doing anything, <br />
not even ruffling air. <br />
As I learn myself how best to be tangy shy<br />
of acquiring anything above the knee, <br />
so am I gratefully Adrienne Fromsett<br />
seeing you only in bruises in mirrors<br />
as you wail away, "I am so struck by<br />
the turtle in your haircut!” Don’t think me culturally<br />
indebted to your wildlife thumping anti-anti-brutality <br />
resistance fund. This is the test, the contents<br />
of your stomach reveal what a fireproof<br />
curtain ate. <br />
Camera eye! Stapled to a Kahlua<br />
of snot-puce slime and the river Spleen. <br />
I taught one how to drive a beetle<br />
then all the beans in the world grew. <br />
I am so fireproof. Try me. <br />
That’s what he said just before donning<br />
the thong. <br />
What’s that you think aloof? My testicular <br />
frolic, my rate card for mowing myself bi-weekly?<br />
What if we find out this is all only a mint? <br />
What if you find out too late I was truly<br />
the gentleman you sought for questioning<br />
about the missing flab? <br />
Kissing you is like kissing my still drippy<br />
dead great aunt the used Puffs. <br />
Staple one to a microchip, the other<br />
to a microchimp and see if you can tell<br />
the future in a finger. The drop-and-unroll <br />
of spring. You do not make me board.<br />
It’s all about your life as a gorilla in the tub,<br />
the thing you say you can snap like a rubber. <br />
I’m betting you think you can but won’t. <br />
Too many gangplanks for not enough<br />
klans, too many yanks without definition,<br />
I’ve been to the gym, I’ve scented it, I know<br />
how the lame sires roll. <br />
Doing funny faces and not having any picture <br />
that is not moved. <br />
<br />
The Jason Alexander lookalikes really seem to be <br />
enjoying the shrimp. <br />
<br />
Miscreants. <br />
<br />
The girl in the horse head suit, stealing her tenderness from Jack<br />
with the badge and the eyepatch. <br />
And of course this headstrong dung squirrel. <br />
And of course this headfirst face-down derivational element<br />
in retention deficit profile and how to stop thinking shoes. <br />
The teetering shot when she wonders if the haircut also bought<br />
itself a second free bowl of soup. <br />
<br />
All such stories end in a blistering three-way flautist, sleeplessly<br />
oh - mercifully? Lest I use the word fume in a much too spidery<br />
train. I likee that Narrow Margin you’re waving as you walk away. <br />
Thwacking infinities from my Robitussin…wait…that was YOUR<br />
Robitussin? No wonder I can’t shake these misgivings.<br />
And no wonder you tease at a shit cake. <br />
Like Ginger constructed from unborn steel, weened on Miami Vice.<br />
Frankly anyone in his right mind would rather do the jerk. <br />
Better that than your slow-lane energy bar. <br />
<br />
I once ate an entire fleapit by myself, just to slicker some rubes, <br />
and what menacing, terribleness befell me then? Only the most<br />
unjust rush to fudge. The fabulous miseries of a horse with a face<br />
like a snapshot, stoop shouldered? Slope shouldered? Fashion gas? <br />
Nine-to-five banging on the same dud with the same short<br />
handled rusty dead father sledge. <br />
Sure I’m a spendthrift, it’s woven in my balusters. <br />
“Luke!” he keeps on crying in my waking. <br />
Head, I can’t fine it!” she yawps in her eight hour nightly coughing jag. <br />
The pee of the thunderstorm spelled out finis.<br />
In marvelous coats of splendiferous wondrous worm skewer<br />
on golf tee. <br />
Sirenia misting my glasses with that pre-cum that robs you <br />
of souvenir cozies. I’d jig if I thought it’d do any harm to the crops. <br />
But once having swung it’s a thing you can only get back<br />
by swinging again this time with equal but flattering starvation. <br />
Like your pretend friend the FUCK ME!!!<br />
I make me miserably tee. <br />
I make you miserably tee-hee.<br />
I make me the me that makes redhots<br />
of your miserably glib merit badge chastity tie. <br />
Stave in your silly-skull I’m busy forging <br />
flatteries of my own to take to the thrifty morgue<br />
where the jabber completes your death rejection threat. <br />
Once he slew the monster that flattened him<br />
like a miserable BVD, once slain the monster bit me, but<br />
had also become me wearing my slain merit on my Funk<br />
N. Stein inscribed copy of the eponymy of the closure<br />
of the grand spinning trench you shoved me in<br />
in your Dad’s Super-8 porn reels instead of lunch. <br />
One can spin on its nose for a month. <br />
One is a chronic tercentenary. <br />
One thinks books are ledges.<br />
Which leads to the question of magic in Korea. <br />
Can’t you just remove yourself into the ghost<br />
of the train the odds say must derail by the time<br />
on your leg lump watch? <br />
The path of a train has only one purpose. <br />
The rest is metal and spit. <br />
Trailing a bulbous bad skin jowly dorsal finish. <br />
<br />
“You are not afraid of saying ‘I Love You’ to a friend if<br />
you are not afraid of saying ‘I can’t keep going with this<br />
anymore.”<br />
<br />
More movies please. More movies about places from which<br />
I can leave you more frequently. Like tearing open the steerage<br />
in the USS Jealously and watching all the Murakamis flood<br />
into the glutted workforce. But that unbuilt train was number three<br />
of the pair, the phlegm a mish-mash of unpredictable situations.<br />
That slimness you see behind the bruises in the mirror you’ve never<br />
seen. It’s too mellow, too tersely he, too much like the fruit-eating <br />
specter in your orthopedic campaign slogan microchimp greeting card! <br />
Geee I thinks I gots it, geez it’s a sorta illicitness shaped like a ‘59<br />
Thunderbird, fired for insurance, connected to you by the world’s<br />
skinniest ever thread of Alien drool. <br />
Certs.<br />
I'm totally into sixfolds, ready for a seven-up anytime, mired <br />
in ideas that make me want to lead you into the promised tee<br />
stamping machine. We can germinate, make starworts, joyride <br />
in your thrill-pussy until the feminist joie de fever lives up to its name<br />
by taking another westbound asshole up to Stowe. <br />
I don’t know if I need to admit this but my personality test said:<br />
I’m “less sex driven”. <br />
Sometimes I forget to feed the turtle. <br />
I flash the neighbor’s turtle and wait to get slapped and wait and wait<br />
and wait and wait and wait. <br />
<br />
(No one care enough to slap my metal covered densitometer, to gag my split-pea <br />
as it emerging from the sweat bakery.<br />
I am busy avoiding pain and complications. I use my enormous calf. <br />
....um let me think, people is always surprise that i know how <br />
to do so many things, sound –<br />
oh yeah? <br />
well i think the same, but actually i know how to do so many things, <br />
yeah! <br />
sometimes suck, but i do funny cakes, healthy cupcakes, i love to cook <br />
cakes, and what else, getting you to make me writhe on time.<br />
I'm a total nerd and English not even.)<br />
<br />
Once they burned a Latter-Day Saint. <br />
Once they burned a fine-tuned vehicle. <br />
Once they burned a burly thick necked wax effigy of Uncle Warwagon. <br />
You still can't fine-tune a term without the necessary sinter.<br />
I bought a boot you could park Abe Lincoln’s birthplace in <br />
and still have room for the derringer. <br />
Does this perforce make me The Mystery Log? The Teammate <br />
to your anorexia alcoholism anabolic puke bunny? <br />
I swath them in gin to sidestep jarring my kids too soon<br />
into something resembling my grease forehead sketchbooks. <br />
Tell me that’s so threadworn. Teach me how to be wise. <br />
Do without mc-reading/flexile/slipperiness/melancholy/tessellation<br />
for nearly a full turn of the dung-weasel moon. <br />
Do without Skype.<br />
A club is forming around your frostiness, specifiable faces <br />
and lightly dusted die. Any thumb that is under another<br />
thumb that is firm enough to run a sentence through.<br />
I am peri-minstrel. The rhythm of this has bored my turtle<br />
now I must teach him to expire. A stray teat kept coming <br />
to the back door, begging for milk and a warm spot in the garage. <br />
I gave it a geometrician instead. The starkness of the logic just<br />
blew through the wall clear into France where we flailed <br />
for weeks without any more than basic gestural skywriting.<br />
<br />
The sky and I are of like metric size, <br />
I’ve never understood how that can be. <br />
This tenement, though, is only a game<br />
and a game is only a sport to a sporting <br />
gashless crack beacon. <br />
Like, say, Coriolanus. :)<br />
On a thwarted finger held I am<br />
mislaid, enjoying the teargas of gilt <br />
steepening, jihad and bacon<br />
three-decker fleets all vying <br />
for the last available minstrel-cycle. <br />
<br />
The territory is lighting out for you. <br />
<br />
Possibly why I favor the slightness of movies where kids die, <br />
and movies with the kids on the point of death, or memorably <br />
watching themselves be drawn to the edge of the two-way turtle. <br />
The frustrating speedboat liberalism I'm the undertaker to fire.<br />
I have sixfold lacks. <br />
I misadvise to a tee. <br />
Any Minnesota, any flexion, any jungle jar partners. <br />
<br />
He found the formula: can’t live without sandwich.<br />
<br />
And me watching movies with me.<br />
<br><br>Rick Wigginshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00523692547207125395noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1995235272334810474.post-19049228209989756622011-11-02T15:29:00.000-04:002011-11-02T15:29:46.917-04:00FukwitPlatformFader<br><br />
I’m feeling things you can see.<br />
I’m feeling penetrable today. <br />
But my impetus is daffy. <br />
meh.<br />
What brand of car did you used to smoke?<br />
Minefield?<br />
Why do emotional feelings register<br />
in the general area of your dog?<br />
I’m doing the nasty with my pocket<br />
wife while writing this underwater <br />
livestock report to your ripe<br />
lolita head. <br />
snort.<br />
I’m really a real goose, not the ghost<br />
of the goose you tried to gate. <br />
Gating is so eighties. <br />
yawn.<br />
The first of the scriptures was good<br />
but it needed something. <br />
A-1. <br />
The second was better but the patient<br />
died of things. <br />
People.<br />
People usually die of people, <br />
eventually. <br />
Why do emotional feelings register<br />
in the general area of your last<br />
nurse?<br />
Dead people usually notice me.<br />
The lone long dark hair. <br />
One of the reasons I'm getting rid of <br />
my syphilis collection. It makes me<br />
seem pretentious, not bored enough. <br />
Better build a convention hall <br />
on top of that beauty before <br />
she bores me.<br />
Sure Johnny Depp had a costume <br />
of my death. It follows. Sure<br />
I have too many favorite boots.<br />
Like Nihilism. <br />
Why do emotional feelings register<br />
in the general area of what I like<br />
to call my “Spock”? <br />
You suddenly shift an inch in my <br />
estimation and it moves me, shows me<br />
Man’s Search for Nimoy as a form of blues <br />
music you can eat on your lover’s deathbed. <br />
That was grim, like all food.<br />
Man's Search for Calamine Lotion<br />
as a means of provoked masturbation.<br />
In a light, lifelong coma someone<br />
is studying The War of the Worlds<br />
hoax. Her feelings are all right<br />
there, available, checked <br />
for scratches. <br />
We run a stutter-free business here, bud.<br />
Why do emotional feelings register anywhere<br />
but in the pants of a bent wooden Indian <br />
with the face of a Shetland vacuum <br />
minus anything even relatively pink? <br />
The Stranger.<br />
Welles's work is difficult to attribute<br />
to Welles without an annoying apostrophe.<br />
The absurdity of the truth engulfs<br />
and warms even the most hateful<br />
parts of my electrified socket system. <br />
You, on the other hand, have soothed me.<br />
Your hand reached into my “olive jar” hair<br />
and told the Whole Story to someone<br />
of no particular beef cut affiliation. <br />
Like a fifteen minute O. <br />
So spawn already. <br />
Too late, I’m bored erect by your red,<br />
reactionary triangle. <br />
Are these the dark hedonistic <br />
proclivities you said I could<br />
borrow?<br />
Watching men do men? <br />
The Comedy of Joe Louis’s fist<br />
as some sort of historic dry <br />
erase marker?<br />
Apostrophe? <br />
Isn’t that a form of stroke?<br />
Rorschach wants his pen refilled,<br />
you arrested heap. <br />
But your characters are brilliant.<br />
Why do emotional feelings register<br />
in the shapes of light and heat?<br />
I do not watch olives on TV. <br />
Although I work out my problems<br />
in wrought iron fencepost dildo<br />
gewgaw rage. In the fashion <br />
befitting the age. <br />
I’m having a fit right now<br />
and you don’t even smell<br />
like my target demographic, I find <br />
that incredibly sexy. I find<br />
you incredibly feh. <br />
This City is a show about movies about<br />
abhorrence melted down with a rare<br />
aged gouda suffocating the last<br />
of the minor birds. <br />
Dash dash, dot dot, dash. <br />
I’m the same as the bird, prey <br />
are selfish, superficial, ignorant <br />
spoiled sausage aficionados. <br />
Kiss me if you like this show, we will <br />
probably not get along<br />
until I’m at least an inch<br />
and a half. <br />
Same thing probably goes <br />
straight into my satin slip and roots<br />
for a flower of some forgotten<br />
Oprah there. <br />
But for differing reasons.<br />
Why do emotional feelings register<br />
under assumed names?<br />
Gnostic. This is not a word, it is<br />
a word trick. There are no words<br />
that start with G N except<br />
Gnosis and that is a word trick, too. <br />
Each is daffier by a specific percentage<br />
multiplied by signs hidden in nests<br />
in trees. <br />
Tree Scene No. 1: Orson Welles <br />
mistaken for a big eye. <br />
Tree Scene No. 2: deafening songs <br />
with whispered, beautiful, fifteen minute<br />
orgasm loops instead of lyrics.<br />
We miss the hoopla, the nude singalongs,<br />
the phantom sleep of the coldcut. <br />
I crave color. <br />
I crave it a lot. <br />
I can see that it’s a lie. <br />
Books about olives drown me<br />
in your scent. Chanel Number<br />
get off, get famous, get slept. <br />
End. End again. <br />
Pass me a Holstein, I eat mirth <br />
like a newborn mother<br />
drowning in conversation.<br />
I can charm an entire room.<br />
You start with the gates<br />
and work your way down<br />
to the core. The cheesecake<br />
and the home-made you-wish. <br />
Two little red hens in a girl.<br />
She’s wearing an environment. <br />
She needs change. <br />
She clowns on the side. <br />
You could be 100 years old<br />
and I’d still consider you short-term.<br />
Why do emotional resistances <br />
feel like currents in the veil <br />
of your lost time? <br />
Why is this so inappropriately<br />
pretty? <br />
The mother is sending the signal<br />
to the bird but the bird is preoccupied<br />
hammering the anvil into the shape<br />
of a Jesus filter. <br />
Original people made of pulled-pork.<br />
Pulled-pork girls with bonnets<br />
of pulled-pork. Pulled-pork<br />
pen-pals spilling their environments<br />
like so much seedless tree. <br />
I’m in love with my first mentor<br />
and the girl underneath his cloak.<br />
I am soon to marry. <br />
Please do not be another man.<br />
Please pull your pork in the <br />
designated areas. <br />
The environment is for accessing<br />
rare materials and licking<br />
is for members only. <br />
Please do keep this in mind.<br />
Why emote at all when you can<br />
just feel within a limited sphere? <br />
A rare steak, she was barely<br />
four foot ten. Ripped<br />
from the pages of a stiff, congealed<br />
spine, a custom feelings<br />
register with fresh nine volt<br />
batteries to alert you once<br />
you’re burning. <br />
I admit it, I smuggled her<br />
inside when no one was looking<br />
at the smoking car. <br />
Why? <br />
You are green, like a skilled tree.<br />
Seemed a harmless little fuk. <br />
And I quote. <br />
<br><br>Rick Wigginshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00523692547207125395noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1995235272334810474.post-36561848748170485952011-10-20T11:55:00.000-04:002011-10-20T11:55:29.739-04:00I MISS NOT SEEING YOUR MONUMENTS<br><br />
<br />
I got your note about the nightmare<br />
that someone cut your mouth open<br />
and that that was the future of America.<br />
Having trouble deciphering and having<br />
a nightmare that you were a blonde t-shirt. <br />
Or was this the one where the ceiling<br />
was the falling triangle of life? <br />
Was it the one about the live pink dress<br />
and the enormous Olde English D?<br />
How they’d sneak into the ballpark after hours<br />
pretending it was a police station <br />
and “water” the morgue with Olde English <br />
crop circles somebody sent in an attachment? <br />
Attachments work because you need them to.<br />
If you begin to feel attached to this message<br />
or your vasovagal syncope returns stop, step <br />
away, take a walk, lie down, die, get some water. <br />
When the feeling passes resume the operation. <br />
Operations work because you want them to. <br />
A whole different thing than a dream. And<br />
in practical terms impossible, so safe. Safe to relive<br />
your personal Vietnam in a way that entertains<br />
but similar enough to canoeing to make no dent <br />
in the natural attention deficit. It’s like making<br />
love in ways that only a point-n-shoot and some <br />
rousing singalongs can. I saw, in my dream,<br />
a man like a troll at the mouth of my bridge<br />
to heaven. He was holding a pair of ball<br />
bearings slightly out of round but no less<br />
intimidating, no less the symbol of a nation<br />
on the brink. I had my own water, crossed it<br />
and went home to vomit a paisley sunset. <br />
Sunsets work because you insist on making them<br />
do the dirty work for you. You’re lazy and stupid. <br />
Hope you're having prettier dreams tonight. <br />
Have one for me. I’m currently riding a tiny <br />
white man like as if he was Seabiscuit (the cereal) <br />
and all around a landscape of oranges and orange<br />
boneless people in the shapes of their initials. <br />
My dad is definitely dying now. He kept saying so<br />
for so long but we treated it like a poem. <br />
He’d finish it some day then we’d stop<br />
watching The Deadliest Catch. <br />
Poems work because you fill them with gas<br />
and pray that they’ll rise and carry your ID <br />
past security. Those dudes are sometimes huge.<br />
Nothing works like a huge dude works, I read<br />
that on a TV once along with a picture <br />
of someone contracting live pink cancer<br />
marshmallows. In a crowd only the crowd<br />
has a presence, a body, need of a bath. <br />
A crown is almost identical only encrusted<br />
in irreproducible gems of lowbrow “genius”. <br />
You can make a crowd work for you, but a Crown<br />
Victoria will run 200k miles without changing <br />
the oil then explode and vomit out the remains<br />
of its driver and any passengers in the shape<br />
of a crowd collecting under a vomiting sun. <br />
So if he’s serious about dying this time stop <br />
treating this like it’s some poem or I’ll have<br />
to kick you squarely in the canon.<br />
Canons work because you want to blow off<br />
as many dangerous limbs of a crowd as possible<br />
at once and you don’t care how you have to spell it. <br />
I bought a blue dog just to piss you off<br />
cuz you said I reminded you of its childhood.<br />
Dogs don’t work for shit against crowns. <br />
That’s the whole point of being a dog, otherwise<br />
why bother? That’s why you need a point-n-shoot <br />
and some steel balls. Get in there, mix it up, show <br />
‘em you’re made of chemicals, take pictures and email <br />
them to your friends so they won’t have to see you<br />
taking the pictures in person in your second best<br />
pink skin party frock. Dodging cops at f11, happy <br />
to be alive at such a pivotal moment in the history<br />
of the controlled demolition of a building, a building<br />
that left itself days before the crowd realized the car <br />
had exploded taking them all across the bridge. <br />
Buildings work because they fail to work eventually. <br />
I dreamed I was a child labor felled tree toter out <br />
in the country near mountains and a drowning king<br />
in some country on a planet you made up at dinner<br />
as a joke. Spinach stuck in your tooth ha-ha-funny, <br />
not the my dad is dying weird-funny. The funny <br />
that inevitably ends in a kind of three-way hell. <br />
Hell works but not always, it’s a dice roll at best. <br />
All hell's done broke loose here, or's about to. <br />
As of tonight I'm officially at that point <br />
we've always known would arrive, when I can <br />
no longer hold my fingers together in that sign<br />
of unspoken solidarity or back-the-fuck-off <br />
or whatever it’s supposed to have meant. <br />
I have no idea what you’ve been talking about<br />
and I have RSI and I don’t think that’s working<br />
for me anymore. The incommunicado approach <br />
requires a much stronger hat. Intimacy and sharing<br />
require more robust hats to last. And your glasses:<br />
they’re corny. Like a non-geek pretending to be<br />
pretending to be geeky. Or nerdy. Or whatever. <br />
Words don’t work. They aren’t about secrets <br />
anymore. Secrets were always the only things<br />
that worked. Don’t ask me why, it just illustrates<br />
your stupidity. But it’s a very intelligent question, <br />
it isn't about secrets or no secrets, not even about trust...<br />
it comes down to simply letting someone else order<br />
the fish that will choke you in death, choke you in revenge<br />
for supporting the fish killing industry and thinking<br />
you can dodge those nearly invisible killer bones.<br />
For watching The Deadliest Catch which, funny<br />
irony, isn’t even about catching fish, per se. <br />
Fish work because there is nothing there but scales. <br />
Fish scales work because you need something <br />
to weigh against the sunset you know is seizing up<br />
inside the crowd, its colon swelling against a pink dusk.<br />
It’s about speaking the same language, language<br />
of the moment, language of the mouth, of the heart.<br />
That had to have been intended to say “of the moth.”<br />
but this is an all-smoking building. <br />
<br><br>Rick Wigginshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00523692547207125395noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1995235272334810474.post-91212153657655522902011-10-19T04:59:00.000-04:002011-10-19T04:59:50.592-04:00SleetTankCommandant<br><br><br />
<br />
<b>My self-summary of someone else smearily similar to myself</b><br />
<br />
So my life is a total bitch, and I can’t wait to meet her.<br />
Like an awesome PBS show from the eighties when your set’s<br />
set on autodimple. Does anyone awesome still say something<br />
is on the blink? I do! Not that I’m ready to go Dolby Surgical<br />
Labia Dongle shopping with you yet, but if you meet me it will be<br />
just like we’re starting already at season 5. The one where<br />
the premise is all played out and the writers have moved to a new<br />
town where an identically awesome diamond stuffed Pelican or midlife<br />
uglyfruit struggles with his ne’er do well brother in a neighboring<br />
snowmobile universe. A haunted carnival instead of a hospital. <br />
The crack-me-up sound of a book pile lighting itself afire instead<br />
of a Cowper’s Gland by Cover Girl recital.<br />
<br />
It's fun to be me, PBS-like, I was oddly conceived out of<br />
focus and naturally awesome. You might not think it very<br />
awesome that I sell peeks at my steam-punk fuchsia mongoose<br />
to Flipper (he has Melancholia) for nickels, but once you've gone lame<br />
you’ll never reframe they say. The genius is in the indefensible, the shuttering<br />
of the new-wave school for the blind just as that awesome U2 song was about<br />
to be rereleased on department store salami. <br />
<br />
I'm a native eating New Yorker so not much de-phases my head’s spine.<br />
I don't let the littler things I step on get me down and the bigger things<br />
that might step on me I just walk around, limping a touch in case. Last time<br />
I forgot to be awesome I was left with only one left hand per compliment. <br />
<br />
I am only slightly sinister (a Latin pun I learned on Telemundo), creative<br />
but notched like a post on a bed, I’m a party I’m always awesomely throwing,<br />
I have a very awesomely sexy voice and use it on my furniture almost hourly,<br />
yet I can't sing Ghetto Dreams without a full chorus of pigs in shades.<br />
<br />
But it's my humidity that makes me so awesome...I dream, moist, of things<br />
that are bigger, then wake myself up and make my stomach dizzy with the<br />
conspiracy. I practice self-hypnosis on my fashion sense, visualize my head<br />
in outer space then make the moon happen again. It takes a lot of practice. <br />
If you want I’ll teach you how to practice and you’ll never be able to do it<br />
or anything ever. But wanting to do what we can’t is what makes us awesomer. <br />
That’s some truth you can fly in the face of sans shame, sans signs.<br />
<br />
I Shoot the hip and spray lead at the arts with my heart. Being quick on my feet<br />
is a dangling idea, banded collars make me instantly Asian and when I’m a Negro<br />
I don't miss a beat. I like to be. (and I am, just try stepping on my buzz and see<br />
what the gypsies who bought up my option feed their plasma dogs tomorrow)<br />
<br />
I can always be found being stabbed on a street, dashing off to show someone<br />
my gashes, truthful until I speak at all or if not, thoughtful as in I think about how<br />
awesome it is to be thinking about how awesome I must seem to you.<br />
<br />
I tend to piles of leaves of elderly nuns outside a dilapidated inner city convent. <br />
Some of them have been there since the original tree, the one Adam West ate<br />
in that cartoon about a guy who comes to Earth to save everyone's stamps. <br />
<br />
Questions? They’re a mark of weakness and I can sell anything that fits under<br />
a dome. Don’t miss this shit, it won’t happen again for another fifteen microbeads.<br />
<br />
I know you know I’m completely awesome and that means I’m complete<br />
with floor mat and suggested positions but I still dream of finding someone<br />
to be awesome with in a catalog. Preferably with exemptions built in. <br />
<br />
I have a lot of friends, many are lifers. (the system is a deterrent to crime but<br />
nothing like Purim dinner with no inhibitions, I’ve laid out my imaginary tools<br />
in front of my imaginary family).<br />
<br />
There are many sides to me. Seven if you count each foot. Many sides to my life.<br />
Three if you count each exhalation. I spent my life learning to beat the house.<br />
If you are my house, the home for my heart, I hope to find someone to beat you with.<br />
That would have awesomosity I haven’t even unwrapped yet. <br />
<br />
<b>What I’m doing with my life keeps edging away a few more feet just as I’m about to get in <br />
and it’s cheesing me off like I can’t even tell you </b><br />
<br />
Travel is a bitch who travels. I travel for work. But I have some nice free time<br />
when I’m in traction. Free time is a bitch with a watch. I like to spend time with friends<br />
when I'm not working on projecting my image onto the side of the building next door. <br />
The entire hospital can see me from any window on the North side plus all the traffic<br />
that wrecks on the street. Supply and demand. New York had a lot of things to do<br />
and I did them, places to go and I went there twice, and things to eat that I ate.<br />
There is now a crippling shortage of All Stuff.<br />
<br />
I also am in a cattle town talking to a western marshal about the state of the cattle<br />
arts and I teach it to orphans as well. I’m building an awesome army for the future!<br />
<br />
<b>I’m really good at one line meanings</b><br />
<br />
I am not good at one line meanings, worse at meeting your bipedal expectations<br />
and I hope never to be in a room with a view that isn’t facing North. (I should never<br />
be called before dinner, I’m busy in the boiler room carbon dating vagrants from the<br />
other kind of depression, nothing that happens here is as good as the real world).<br />
<br />
<b>The first things people usually notice about me pass through one of two slits</b><br />
<br />
I was told by a gypsy orphan once that I would grow up to be a gypsy and one day,<br />
if I was lucky, I might be an orphan, too, or a pupa with no butterfly to press against<br />
the dome above the capital J. Why is everyone’s middle initial J? Is there something<br />
wrong in here and you’re keeping it from me because you’re afraid I might awesomely<br />
fix it? Or take you down to the boiler room with your mom and the dormant killer bees? <br />
<br />
I was told by a gypsy once that I had no eyes. That they’d been there when I left<br />
for lunch but were gone when I arrived back five minutes late. They had just failed to reappear. <br />
Then my smile. But even so I can also can various types of fruits. Tomatoes, beets, relishes. <br />
Then I’ll pull out my key and start up a conversation with any one (this is more of a soup dish, <br />
it comes in a powder, you just add water then wait for the pigs).<br />
(but no Soylent Green or long form pig).<br />
<br />
<b>I…</b><br />
<br />
…see thin things other people miss because of my super narrow vision.<br />
<br />
…look at my self in the mirror as well as my self live with the thin things<br />
I stuff and/or mount.<br />
<br />
…would like to find love or sex but I have lived with out having some one<br />
in my life for a while and don’t seem to be missing much. Except you of course.<br />
<br />
…guess I will have to say I like my friends. They aren’t very hip. <br />
<br />
…crave a mosque or mosquito tent or muskrat hutch or mausoleum or a quiet place.<br />
<br />
…think it's nice waking up to irrationality, malaria, shit, eternity, less noise.<br />
<br />
…don’t like clean things being “clean” and clean sheets “not” being sticky.<br />
(Not that getting sticky can't be fun but staying sticky for long is a bit of a drag. <br />
I hot tar my entire interior twice a year on both Xmases so I know)<br />
<br />
…read poetry a lot and deny any growth on my abdomen and any change in my<br />
sofa and any sofa in my life that doesn’t look like Rectimus the Wonder Divan<br />
from the first season of The Complete Works of Raymond Orifice.<br />
<br />
...spend a lot of time thinking about trying not to think about cake.<br />
<br><br>Rick Wigginshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00523692547207125395noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1995235272334810474.post-19957177967010555762011-09-19T13:39:00.000-04:002011-09-19T13:39:32.837-04:00BEING A SCRAPBOOK CONSULTANT IS EASY (Part I)<br><br><br />
I looked deep into my heart to write and found<br />
concept art of proto-Bob Barker the antagonist<br />
of Bram Stoker’s famous novel, One Hundred <br />
Years of Tuna Abstinence, set in the undersea <br />
mountains of Mule Lick, NV (not far from Berlin, <br />
NV) where the cold war is kept on ice when WANG!<br />
a book of explosions and experiments went off<br />
fragging my commanding officer, a near mint pussy <br />
complete with original box and instruction manual. <br />
The manual offered detailed instructions for each <br />
experiment. It included a geyser tube and balloons. <br />
<br />
Nevada scares the fuck outta me.<br />
<br />
I thought about calling Brad for advice but<br />
Brad scares the fuck outta me.<br />
<br />
People often ask, “How can I change my last name?”<br />
“How can I control my face?” I considered looking<br />
for the answers to your painful questions on Facebook<br />
but the new Facebook scares the fuck outta me.<br />
<br />
Fitness questions, for example, as they pertain<br />
to the poor. The poor lack the wherewithal for<br />
basic everyday resources like bottled water and<br />
leopard leotards. Not because they are by definition <br />
poor (profitable!) but because they inconvenience me. <br />
Hates that.<br />
Nothing scares the shit outta you more than <br />
a mosquito you can hear but not see. Amirite?<br />
<br />
Lon Chaney could contort his body into the shape<br />
of an invisible airborne parasite and motivational <br />
speaker John Basedow, gay-straight friendly TV <br />
personality multinational Pakistani razor brand <br />
and Holy Cow Shark Milk resistance band mascot. <br />
(A portion of all shark milk goes to rebuild the poor.) <br />
The recipient of numerous humanitarian awards <br />
delivered via totally ripped and smokin’ warhead.<br />
Only the YOU ARE STILL NOT HERE marker survives. <br />
Mall of America scares the fuck outta me.<br />
<br />
It begins to be like living in the real Minecraft. <br />
Armor can mitigate damage from mob attacks, <br />
while weapons can be used to kill enemies and <br />
other animals. The game has no set goals and <br />
cannot be won. My virtual goldendoodle hides<br />
under the abandoned ammo dump, her tail<br />
a rip in the sundial I spent all night hard coding. <br />
A train-wreck is coming. <br />
A train-wreck is coming. <br />
Minecraft scares the fuck outta me.<br />
<br />
See this guy right here? This guy has a green beret<br />
and can do fourteen trillion push-ups. He paid six-<br />
hundred bucks to say he wrote All Apologies,<br />
he’s a modern day goldsmith Mannerist sepia baby <br />
eraser in a blog café with unlimited papal mint refills. <br />
This guy scares the fuck outta me.<br />
<br />
And then I realized something that transformed<br />
me in a way I hadn’t expected or prepared for: <br />
<br />
The future scares the fuck outta me.<br />
<br />
The crack of dawn scares the fuck outta me.<br />
<br />
The basement hall scares the fuck outta me.<br />
<br />
Your background scares the fuck outta me.<br />
<br />
Snow death scares the fuck outta me.<br />
<br />
Skeletron scares the fuck outta me.<br />
<br />
The Pope scares the fuck outta me.<br />
<br />
Dr. Who scares the fuck outta me.<br />
<br />
Mrs. Pac Man scares the fuck outta me. <br />
<br />
This shit my Mom has outside the house <br />
scares the fuck outta me.<br />
<br />
Noodles: Just the thought of that <br />
scares the fuck outta me.<br />
<br />
Cindy McCain scares the fuck outta me.<br />
<br />
This pic where you stare at the screen till<br />
sumpthin’ scares you scares the fuck outta me.<br />
<br />
I know he lost most of his jaw to cancer but <br />
Roger Ebert’s “new face” scares the fuck outta me.<br />
<br />
The earth just scares the fuck outta me.<br />
<br />
Melissa Dettwiller: This chick scares the fuck outta me...<br />
but I'm still strangely compelled to plow her in the dirthole.<br />
<br />
This new automatic Febreze sprayer we got <br />
scares the fuck outta me.<br />
<br />
I hate when something scares me <br />
when I’m trying to drink something.<br />
My hands and feet go cold, I get pale,<br />
like seeing a life-size Barbie the Malibu <br />
Climatologist giving birth to a classic <br />
50’s Barbie in a c-section hootenanny dress. <br />
<br />
The cost of a baby is roughly the same<br />
as the cost of having your arm fat siphoned<br />
but twice as much as a full-price rhinoplasty. <br />
It’s cheaper to be circumcised in the Midwest <br />
than on the east coast, cheaper to buy than to rent<br />
a national park. (Give her a birthday she’ll never forget!)<br />
These indelible images of our glorious history<br />
will last forever unless one of us drinks enough.<br />
Child birth scares the fuck outta me.<br />
<br />
De ja vu scares the fuck outta me so I try and stop it <br />
on purpose, like if I feel it happening I try and not do <br />
what I did in the vision, if I can help it.<br />
<br />
That zipper scares the fuck outta me. <br />
who says we have to give up our innocence? <br />
I heart the beach. <br />
I wanna live somewhere that snows.<br />
And when I do, I think it's a damn shame that we just<br />
don’t all call Charles Lee Ray and ask him nicely why<br />
so Lee Harvey James Earl Sirhan Serious?<br />
<br />
Look, I may have been 14 when The Lion King came out, <br />
but the hyenas are obvious Nazis at the one minute, forty-six <br />
second mark, no matter what people say. Those are Nazis. <br />
And Nazis scare the fuck out of me. I blame the copious <br />
amount of Nazi Germany documentaries I’ve watched.<br />
I don't fear the Reaper, but Christopher Walken <br />
scares the fuck outta me.<br />
<br />
De ja vu scares the fuck outta me so I try and stop it <br />
on purpose, like if I feel it happening I try and not do <br />
what I did in the vision, if I can help it.<br />
<br />
Meanwhile, at Burger King...Burger King scares the fuck outta me.<br />
What can I say, I'm an all consuming vortex of homosexuality.<br />
Big shit still scares the fuck outta me.<br />
<br />
I like lots of different kinds of movies, that’s why I started<br />
this fever resistant strain of the virus, sweating and loss of<br />
caramel color, the scare spread quickly, virally, cancer<br />
in the public interest. A laugh-riot egregious attempt<br />
to blindfold the testers and switch their selections. I love love <br />
stories the best but love's hair scares the fuck outta me.<br />
<br />
AHHH, I see a giant yellow frog <br />
who constantly says its name, <br />
and forcing kids to have fun <br />
on a sunny, constantly-happy island...<br />
does this island make my fat look like an ass?<br />
It’s got Elias Koteas in it and he always<br />
scares the fuck outta me. <br />
<br />
Space scares the fuck outta me.<br />
<br />
The thought of getting old, living alone and possibly <br />
never having sex again scares the fuck outta me. <br />
So I try to enjoy what time I have by talkin to people<br />
like Kirk in a transporter mishap talking with Lumpy Branum. <br />
Or one of his minor lady-loves. He asks her will you make <br />
America a Sanctuary City? The nineteenth century or <br />
the stone age? Is this the way to Simi Valley or a hole<br />
in Pismo Beach? Plato’s stepchildren sired by Bold Ruler <br />
out of Somethingroyal.<br />
<br />
Shatner scares the fuck outta me.<br />
<br />
They’ve been storing the hunks of twisted building<br />
and half crushed fire trucks in a hangar at JFK. Maybe <br />
we'll find out it was totally acceptable for a lady to <br />
envision all the critical elements of her wedding day; <br />
long before she meets the person she will marry.<br />
Maybe she’ll take a wrong turn and marry a half<br />
crushed fire truck, thinking it human remains. <br />
For a young woman to dream that she is preparing <br />
vegetables for dinner, foretells that she will lose <br />
the man she desired through pique, but she will win <br />
The Super Bowl, The World Series, A Championship Fight, <br />
The Masters, Wimbledon, The US Open, The Stanley Cup, <br />
The World Cup, and a pair of purple acetate sunglasses<br />
fused to a pair of traditional wire aviators in green<br />
just moments before she utters her final words, <br />
<br />
“I ask that you please stop sitting <br />
on the wall, it scares the fuck outta me <br />
when I come outside and you keep setting <br />
my motion detectors off.” <br />
<br />
Cleverbot Chertoff Fat Girls Laughing Leftist Whispering <br />
scares the whatever out of whomever you see making it <br />
all look easy. Like Betty Crocker said, (in the pan) “I never <br />
existed in your active chamber, but in a corner of the gun <br />
closet behind the minks the ghosts of a once vital industry, <br />
the pulse of America’s collective neck, scares the fuck outta me.” <br />
<br />
I dont wanna die knowing that you’ll cry over me but <br />
if death means watching The Biggest Loser or reruns <br />
of terror bloopers replacing destinationless circling tourist <br />
monomonuments with his-n-hers depressions and a urinal <br />
or never getting over being with you, I might as well take <br />
my own life letting a structure jump out from under me<br />
just for the caloric boost. Death scares the hell outta me. <br />
Hell scares the fuck outta me. <br />
<br />
So I’m all good. <br />
<br />
This is my favorite sweater because it scares the fuck outta me.<br />
<br />
It’s homemade, like if an alien were to fall to Earth, meet a girl, <br />
pick up a guitar, and retreat to a cabin in the woods, it’s possible <br />
his first record would sound a lot like MY HAIR FUCKING SCARES ME <br />
by Tool and I ALWAYS THINK THERE’S SOMETHING HORRIBLE <br />
CRAWLING ON MY ARM by Tool, too. I’d be being tea-bagged <br />
by the Muse and strangely at peace with my lot. <br />
The Muse no longer fucking scares me. <br />
And when I say “Sharks are my biggest fear” I mean the words<br />
“sharks” and “milk” and “are” and “my” and “biggest” and “fear” <br />
and “I” and “mean” are my biggest fear. No wonder it scares me <br />
if I don’t wake up! Or if I wake up without you in my phone. <br />
<br />
p.s.<br />
I hate the sweater you re-regifted me on our last Xmas together <br />
because it used to scare the fuck outta me but now I just think <br />
it’s warm. And that scares the fuck outta me. <br />
<br />
p.p.s.<br />
Call me, Brad. <br />
<br><br>Rick Wigginshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00523692547207125395noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1995235272334810474.post-4368218712505527222011-08-15T06:53:00.000-04:002011-08-15T06:53:02.673-04:00AntietamMakeupArtist<br><br><br />
<i>"A true hotrodder wouldn't be content <br />
until he had created a car so violent, <br />
so hairy, so totally sick that the very <br />
act of dropping the hammer would <br />
result in instant death. Anything less <br />
results in the need to go faster."</i> <br />
~ Tony DeFeo<br />
<br />
<br />
I am a very communicative person.<br />
That is my hobby. But sometimes I think.<br />
What about you, are you a communicative <br />
person? I communicate myself. <br />
<br />
At what age did we stop talking in pictures? <br />
When did we start to just write instead of<br />
communicate? Why is the airbag light on<br />
in my car? <br />
<br />
What are you communicating?<br />
Do you have healthcare? I don’t care <br />
about healthcare, what I care deeply about <br />
is this issue of the heavyweight division rankings. <br />
<br />
I like to live with nature <br />
at a distance where I can keep it <br />
from doing anything jerky that might frighten off <br />
my precious flights of free time.<br />
<br />
I like to traverse the spaces between <br />
your total ignorance <br />
(doesn’t ignorance = hate?)<br />
and my pumpkin orange beanbag chair. <br />
<br />
l married my childhood<br />
relaxation therapist <br />
and he laid there for two hours hyperventilating. <br />
<br />
I said it was love, the real thing, <br />
on a sinking ship with one lifeboat too few, <br />
the word sabotage never came up. <br />
<br />
I’ve never minded falling in love, <br />
my only objection is the fact that<br />
I had to repaint the terrace, twice.<br />
<br />
I have been getting divorced <br />
for nearly thirty six years now. <br />
I think it's time to find a person <br />
to have a relationship for me.<br />
<br />
I have a body and soul connection<br />
you’re more than welcome to <br />
burrow into and remain hidden from predators<br />
on alternate weekends through Labor Day.<br />
<br />
I smoke <br />
as a rule. <br />
I was born with an extra <br />
thumbnail generator. <br />
<br />
I work as a book keeper,<br />
mid-century room divider, <br />
it’s very scary when you compare it<br />
to being paired off with a ghost. <br />
<br />
I was with an auto mechanic for six months<br />
when the damn thing just went VROOM!<br />
That had me doing the dance! <br />
I’m highly adaptable company. <br />
<br />
We were talking about movies that make no sense. <br />
Why in Brazil there was nothing about Brazil? <br />
I love movies that make me think<br />
about Brazil. <br />
<br />
And suddenly I find myself <br />
having to say I’m from Brazil! <br />
In Brazil we practice new sports <br />
medicine techniques on our elderly. <br />
<br />
I try to run almost every day<br />
like a bitch on heat.<br />
I’m in good shape and just looking <br />
to have a healthy and long life together <br />
role-playing as a strategy that fits within<br />
the social family of models. <br />
I really like my job<br />
detailing how people feel about their jobs,<br />
characterized by bending forward,<br />
raising the knees and extending the hands.<br />
<br />
The eye is like a backward window, <br />
they say the smile is the window to the heart, <br />
the leaning suggests a certain reluctance,<br />
a finely tuned and toned body and symmetrical<br />
vantage point on the body from above and to the west.<br />
<br />
They say I'm elegant.<br />
I looked out the window yesterday.<br />
<br />
God I can’t wait for the spring, <br />
God I can’t wait for the summer, <br />
God I can’t wait for the summer to end,<br />
God I can’t wait for the fall, <br />
God I can’t wait for this winter to be over. <br />
<br />
I am 40 years old with dreams of a girl<br />
permeating my nostrils,<br />
permeating my consciousness,<br />
permeating my mind. <br />
With this said, I am also convinced<br />
we can know the season<br />
when having it all becomes too much,<br />
by its mottled, exfoliating bark.<br />
<br />
My best friend is a cashier at Dollar Tree.<br />
My bird is trying to mate with his toy?<br />
I heard this big crack and I thought “Oh God,<br />
Don’t let it be that 400 year old tree!”<br />
The concept of a bird family has no universal definition.<br />
<br />
I believe that family and friends<br />
believe in freedom of expression;<br />
I believe that family and friends<br />
can destroy one another.<br />
I live in constant pursuit of images, <br />
powerful images of leaving friends and family. <br />
Images of birds in flight. <br />
<br />
Why does it feel like I haven’t known you<br />
my entire life? Are you that same man? <br />
At the first of the two demonstrations <br />
of his affection, there was something else<br />
just under the surface, a kind of tension, <br />
a call for more firepower in a combat zone. <br />
Without thinking about it, it just sort of became<br />
a nation of whiners, some sort of tattoo design.<br />
<br />
Someone was telling a story about their pets<br />
then everyone started telling pet stories.<br />
When we took him to the vet he was almost already gone.<br />
<br />
Since I turned twenty one I live fully in the present, but <br />
I’ll never forget those trips to the factory. <br />
Raw, voluminous American imagination. <br />
I have high expectations of the future.<br />
That’s where I’m going to have left my watch.<br />
<br><br>Rick Wigginshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00523692547207125395noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1995235272334810474.post-11762794112614591712011-08-12T22:04:00.000-04:002011-08-12T22:04:12.442-04:00THE POINT OF SINGING<br><br><br />
<b>I.</b><br />
<br />
I am two special characteristics<br />
<br />
<br />
I wonder something you are actually curious about<br />
<br />
<br />
I hear an imaginary sound<br />
<br />
<br />
I see an imaginary sight<br />
<br />
<br />
I want an actual desire<br />
<br />
<br />
I am the first line of the poem restated<br />
<br />
<br />
I pretend something you pretend to do<br />
<br />
<br />
I feel a feeling about something imaginary<br />
<br />
<br />
I touch an imaginary touch<br />
<br />
<br />
I worry something that really bothers you<br />
<br />
<br />
I cry something that makes you very sad<br />
<br />
<br />
I am the first line of the poem repeated<br />
<br />
<br />
I understand something you know is true<br />
<br />
<br />
I say something you believe in<br />
<br />
<br />
I dream something you actually dream about<br />
<br />
<br />
I try something you make an effort to do <br />
<br />
<br />
I hope something you actually hope for<br />
<br />
<br />
I am the first line of the poem repeated<br />
<br />
<b>II.</b><br />
<br />
I am two special characteristics<br />
<br />
flatworms. the 32 Signs of a Great Man. <br />
being in love with two people at the same time. helium.<br />
<br />
I wonder something you are actually curious about<br />
<br />
what are the characteristics of an accommodating person?<br />
can you name some “best friend” cartoon characters? <br />
<br />
I hear an imaginary sound<br />
<br />
how are you interpreting it? how was it supposed to be interpreted? <br />
what was the nature of the assignment?<br />
<br />
I see an imaginary sight<br />
<br />
small ghost of woman reclining on cutting board reading a book called<br />
“How to Make Small Ghosts”<br />
<br />
I want an actual desire<br />
<br />
on the other hand a person can engage in sexual activity. <br />
with mascara being one of the many requirements. <br />
<br />
I am the first line of the poem restated<br />
<br />
over the past couple of years we have begun to grow.<br />
now to the point where we are HUGE. <br />
<br />
I pretend something you pretend to do<br />
<br />
my comment was made off the record and shouldn’t have been<br />
published. the party was supposed to have been a surprise.<br />
<br />
I feel a feeling about something imaginary<br />
<br />
I am feeling a person through telepathy and I do not understand.<br />
what does it feel like to have an organism?<br />
<br />
I touch an imaginary touch<br />
<br />
I want my skin to stop burning for just 5 minutes so I can know what <br />
that feels like. I want to be alone but I can’t be because the world is here.<br />
<br />
I worry something that really bothers you<br />
<br />
or even better one could say, “I am happy with everything!<br />
which would batter the situation with positivity!”<br />
<br />
I cry something that makes you very sad<br />
<br />
buy a car with bad credit!<br />
go ape idiom!<br />
<br />
I am the first line of the poem repeated<br />
<br />
extracted from a large collection of miscellaneous collections.<br />
a woman torturing a small man. <br />
<br />
I understand something you know is true<br />
<br />
among other common lies we have the silent lie,<br />
the deception one conveys by simply keeping still.<br />
<br />
I say something you believe in<br />
<br />
humanity has known the earth to be round for a few millennia<br />
and I have been meaning to revise that video.<br />
<br />
I dream something you actually dream about<br />
<br />
do you know how to turn the world into a turntable?<br />
Mozart wants you to bake it in a cake. <br />
<br />
I try something you make an effort to do <br />
<br />
our greatest glory is not in never failing, but in<br />
finding the best way to fail in real estate. <br />
<br />
I hope something you actually hope for<br />
<br />
the string game creates what looks loosely like a cradle<br />
unfolding within a pregnant woman’s womb. <br />
<br />
I am the first line of the poem repeated<br />
<br />
<b>III.</b><br />
<br><br>Rick Wigginshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00523692547207125395noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1995235272334810474.post-40121661998144561792011-07-30T13:32:00.000-04:002011-07-30T13:32:34.037-04:00RedeploymentPhase<br><br><br />
<b>My Me-ness Made Squeezy</b><br />
<br />
I was born between a wringer and a treaty. <br />
You know the type, they used them for torturing <br />
the dirt out of things. Maybe that isn’t the right word. <br />
Maybe objects d’art of seduction. Maybe trouser psychic.<br />
I’ve decided to leave this space in a blank expanse. <br />
This tells you I’m a great deal as just me as this person already. <br />
As in I’m this person you don’t even already know too well to possess<br />
the necessary lack of understanding to choose when saying no to sex<br />
between saying “to you” or “with you”.<br />
The fact that I inadvertently broke a treaty in saying so tells you more. <br />
Sorry about that, treaty people. So sorry Treaty Man.<br />
Feel free to stop converting your children at any time!<br />
Personally, though, I don’t think simple tendernesses are healthy <br />
snacks. I like eggs, they come from the ground, and everything <br />
in the ground is beautiful…<br />
<br />
until it’s seen by someone ugly. <br />
<br />
<b>Hats Again (and not the last of)</b><br />
<br />
There was this awning once with a big rip right along the edge<br />
and a man on the roof was working with heavy machinery<br />
while the wheelchair children played right underneath him.<br />
But I can be serious, too, when the situation calls for it. <br />
<br />
I'm a collage. I’m made of sharp bits of refuse, I don’t profess to know each<br />
bit or its ultimate purpose in me or tetanus risk, but there’s a plan on a sticky <br />
somewhere, probably underground or in a safe deposit box in a satellite universe<br />
bowling emporium west of the Sixgun Star, way way way up in outer space<br />
where we’ll all be safe in love one day and without being able to give you a tongue<br />
bath and the details simultaneously, let me assure you it's freaking awesome.*<br />
<br />
*But I would say that. I've been on a diet of leaves and twigs found in the treads <br />
of my shoes for a year.<br />
<br />
I could tell you what I reach for in “those” moments, but maybe it's more fun to ask <br />
that you guess with the blade swinging closer to your you know. It would be cool <br />
if someone thought I were capable, but threatening is, for me, also a form of teaching. <br />
I think of fear in the same chair I use when I think of chemistry while making up new<br />
recipes for stew, the difference depends on your upbringing or the sun in your eyes <br />
or a writ of something. Or something. <br />
<br />
I also write. <br />
I’m writing this now.<br />
But now I’m writing something entirely other. <br />
Even the color is not the same and your Glaucoma’s getting serious.<br />
How well we function as a diorama of the battle of Frankenberry Ridge will depend<br />
entirely on how willing you are to invert your belief system for me. Then we’ll<br />
procreate, then we’ll see about twister. Which is what I am doing today.<br />
But you are the cart and I am the horse and I hope you don’t think you can see<br />
any specific long range possibilities in that relative positioning. <br />
<br />
*I have a "doctor" in my name, but he isn’t fully paid off. I only use him on weekends<br />
here and there but I only answer the phone when it doesn’t ring for at least two days<br />
so there’s much to learn, like that and the ankle restraints, when my nurse is not around. <br />
(which is, uh, never.) <br />
I wish I could change it, because it's ridiculous, and I only did what I did because he called <br />
me in airplane mode. I’m old enough to know what that means. I asked "Mr. Noodles" what<br />
to do but his voice box wasn't available. But I can't say I didn’t enjoy the trip to Macroland, or even the bus ride back in the mask, and if that's a deal-breaker for you, well…<br />
<br />
maybe someone just dodged a silver bullet.<br />
<br />
<b>I’m really resemblances</b><br />
<br />
Some guy in the park just told me I look like someone someone might have loved once. <br />
Once some guy in the park told me I looked like Princess Leia with my hair up (I didn't have the side burns then) but that's not really something I'm "good" at, is it? <br />
Some guy in the park told me, yesterday, that I would meet some guy in the park <br />
and he would tell me something wonderful about this city. I gave him my favorite hat. <br />
The next guy that came by said I looked just like Princess Leia only a hat would make <br />
the illusion complete. I have too many children. Most of their wheelchairs are painted<br />
school bus yellow. I want them to feel driven to learn. I want them to beat their fathers.<br />
<br />
For a long time, my stupider twin had a section of her skull reversed so people could tell<br />
when it was time for spaghetti. She recently had it returned to its original orientation. <br />
Now we don’t seem to have anything left to talk about. <br />
<br />
Skill has a way of wearing you down. I’ve been living with a few things, as many as possible<br />
men, though this is constantly changing. How can I be sure when I move back to the States after being in Lockdownia for five years that no one will have done anything without me? <br />
All my past obsessions fit in five recyclable boxes and two order of protection cases. Now that I’m the nest itself, people keep giving me bits of foil, gum wrappers, undigested meat, like I’m the one who dropped in from a cloaking hoverer. Or flubbed the hand-off on fourth and goal. <br />
So I need an extra box or two. I just told a cat to go to hell. Can cats even hear? In space?<br />
<br />
What else? I think I have a nice singing voice. Like a wheel of original cheese hand tainted<br />
by shirtless mastodons while a Belgian girl called Minimal Telecast cuts herself with a personal tank then I get told I am a lovely kisser.<br />
<br />
But everyone gets to judge for themselves, don't they?<br />
<br />
<b>The first is the one you always forget the nicest</b><br />
<br />
According to the staff at the coffee shop where I like to write “I’ll Drink Anything” on the stall<br />
dividers, the first thing people notice about me is how "animated" my face is. They told me when it's slow it looks like a face going really slow and when they take turns watching me <br />
suck on my iced coffee stirrer they become a groupthink strobe light. Apparently I get a cartoon nosejob from everything I see.<br />
<br />
Great.<br />
<br />
<b>A book is a gift for Everett Sloane</b><br />
<br />
“Welcome home, Mister Kane!” Well...any book with arrows that go, "look HERE, stupid" is okay by me. I tend to like the ethical stuff. Or "Wait, isn't this illegal? You have to stand in front of it to get why it's mind-blowing." Really, it's better as a story. Tortured girl received by a bunch of nineteen year-olds. Predictable. If you don't love old guys playing darts on bikes, or funny as fuck peep shows, I will give you your money back. Really. <br />
<br />
I’ll watch television until they stop showing it. But I kind of don't want to talk about music in a roomful of dudes, that feels like a sucker's game or a math headache that stops your heart on flute. Like requiems when they bust out.* I've been reading a lot about concepts, and how these concepts are shit. It's for work.<br />
<br />
*Wow to the prophecy, not to the fact that I just used YouTube as a verb.<br />
<br />
<b>Six dates of curing bacon</b><br />
<br />
After some nervous mail from men, I feel compelled to say the list below is only meant to lower a roman shade, to fake you into thinking Extreme Dating is not some hobby of mine. <br />
It's why I bought these steel gags from a comic shop in Saliva.<br />
<br />
1. See Who Finishes First Date. Kind of like Bone-in Flight Club or Nipples, Italian Style.<br />
<br />
2. Weird Foot Robbery Date. We steal each other’s feet in Chinatown. Similar to Antidepressant Roulette, but with massages. And in Chinatown. I would do the abnormal with you, but if someone else made me laugh, I would do it with them.<br />
<br />
3. The Books Are a Bus Without Brakes! Date. This is a trick where you pick five books you think your date would steal like feet with the built-in expectation you'll be in separate cells. Only applies if the chemistry section is the only section not being mopped. Hilarity or etcetera ensues, etc.<br />
<br />
4. The OH GOD WHY MUST I GET SHY NOW? Date.<br />
<br />
5. The Nude First Date Date. We color in coloring books and drink hot chocolate. Technically, this date does not belong on the list.<br />
<br />
6. The Sushi Date. This date is a euphemistic bowl of gazpacho with or without an idiot. <br />
Most pleasant dates are idiotically themed, but dinner is nice and it’s too hot to eat anyone else, maybe Barry White or one of the Smith Brothers, who I’d happily eat again. But really, I'll eat pretty much anyone. Except Chow Yun Fat in a bun. A friend had him once, and said it was wack.<br />
<br />
7. The Iced Coffee Transfusion Date. It makes up 97 percent of the blood stream already, so what's another emergency between strangers? Preferably in the best park in New York. Although I can be talked into going to the other one. I’ll meet you there now, I’m already here, how’s your day looking? Can you see a park from where you wish you were at? <br />
<br />
Now change it into a party with hats. Now take your hat off. <br />
<br />
<b>I can see the party you’re thinking I’m thinking of</b><br />
<br />
Right now? I'm thinking about throwing a Party in Iran. And the 2011 Arab Spring Break Uprising Gone Wild in my Netflix queue. Uprisings in Tunisia, Egypt, Libya, Syria and so forth. I'm thinking a lot about “uprisings”. And, of course, so forth. <br />
<br />
In a different part of my brain I'm Venus. I’m mulling over two really interesting parades. Then I’m a critical patient. Then a racist sex pervert in exile. Cuz I get high on modernist arcs. Then I’ve gone totally primitive, savage, intellectual, modern. Like having lives as a second career. Like rejecting all beauty as Nico. Now I am about to be running. Now you are. I’m standing still in quotes, but you’re still pointed at the wrong park. Everything that doesn’t<br />
happen doesn’t happen for a reason.<br />
<br />
Where can I get a chimpanzee butler?<br />
<br />
<b>O! The times I’ve had on my watch</b><br />
<br />
I was a thirteen year old named Jenny Xacto Knife. Then I was French <br />
with spigots, draining my perfume to sell outside the will call at the annual <br />
Grand Antithesis. Every time I read this phrase, that Loverboy song pops <br />
into my head. <br />
<br />
I can't be the only one experiencing this.<br />
<br />
<b>Then we came to the final oyster</b><br />
<br />
I started Biting Hotdog Yoga in earnest this past January, and to my surprise, I'm really enjoying my lunches these summer months. But critics are definitely right: Biting Hotdog <br />
can get really rank. More often than not, the studio smells like an old man's bitten hotdog. <br />
Not that I would know. <br />
<br />
Sometimes, when I am procrastinating, I look at profiles and mark men as 'favorites,' with genius notes like, "He's cute." But when the system asks if I want to share the information, I say no, because well, you know. And then I wonder if men are doing the same thing on their computers, and whether I'm on their lists, and if so, how we will ever meet, since neither of us will initiate contact with the other, and how that is a bit sad. Sad like a clown on Sunday morning. Or puppies in POW camps. Or me on the most romantic bench in the park alone with my hotdog, reeking of decomposition and Aqua Velva. <br />
<br />
But then I go back to wondering what it would be like to be in Destiny's Child.<br />
<br />
<b>I’m looking for the answers to the questions you’ve already eaten</b><br />
<br />
So, what am I looking for in a man? That’s a question.<br />
So is who killed Buckwheat. One you can look up online. The other you’ll just have to ask<br />
the morning after when it’s too late to not already have paid for the privilege of your<br />
continuing ignorance. If you’d like to say hello, I suppose now would be the time, before<br />
I’ve thought of the only possible answer. <br />
<br />
Or it’s an idiot.<br />
<br />
<b>Youth of nation say, “Shout this semaphore, gasbag!”</b><br />
<br />
You'd like to say hello, Anyway. And you believe that’s really my name. <br />
And I suppose you think I'm cute, because that's how we sort the field hands <br />
from the eggs they’re torturing out of the ground, right? The workers from <br />
the queens, National Socialist Poultry Council board members from Nifty <br />
Tube Sock Trick Practitioners, Inc. employee of the century, Orville Wilbur Edison Bell <br />
the Second. The gatekeepers from their jobs. <br />
<br />
Note: Okay, after a weak looking suit I made in Photoshop, I changed my entire fashion<br />
statement to, “I have a dream.” I’m trying to expand my color palette. Stripes make<br />
everything look either fatter or less fat, right? I’m sticking with putting myself in spots. <br />
Next I need to add a caveat. <br />
<br />
If the purpose of a note in a bottle is to let me know about your enormous predicament, <br />
or how desensualized you became after the closed head injury, and/or your objective is <br />
that farmhouse eight clicks east along the border of Free Range and Canadian Ham, <br />
or you want to move to a phone , live in it and become our own contacts together. <br />
or Siberia is only a sex position you read about in Premature Cart Fancier’s Monthly, <br />
meet me in any park at dusk and I’ll waste my last best kiss helping you get into my flesh without the trouble of a surface encounter. There have been some I’ve bloviated but <br />
I’ve seen that and I'm not feeling that. Likewise, if you have the words "failed to recognize disc" tattooed on any part of yourself, you've got the wrong tentative woman. And that's not because I’m the wrong tentative woman. It’s because I can't be dishwasher safe. And because I was burned in a cradle warehouse fire. It's really, though, because I won't be exercising for at least six weeks, and that is a quality no one can get around, except maybe your wife.<br />
<br />
So, and to recap, and in conclusion, and summing up, and recorroborating the evidence, <br />
and reiterating, and rehitting the high spots, and reviewing the troops until they’re ready<br />
to go into labor as brain detached as a sunset by Max Factor: I like talking surgeons to death, I like strangers eating me out of house and friends eating me outside of the group home, and I love getting email delivered by hand, but the only kind of sex I like (and boys I like it with) <br />
is otherwise impossible to be reattached until cryogenics has advanced significantly.<br />
Individuals I choose to meet, and dig eggs with, and give email handiwork to in person? <br />
I have to say no to your exceptional skill at clearing me of my bar. <br />
<br />
I’m glad my car has anti-stop brakes. <br />
<br><br>Rick Wigginshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00523692547207125395noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1995235272334810474.post-41531128595459078912011-07-21T05:31:00.001-04:002011-07-21T05:46:03.343-04:00CapsuleSeason<br><br><br />
<b>Never go to the mailbox without a flashlight</b><br />
<br />
SO I GUESS YOU CAN ONLY USE ONE ZIP CODE AT A TIME. <br />
FUCK.<br />
I LIVE IN THE SUBURBS OF VENUS.<br />
IT’S MOSTLY NICE.<br />
YOU CAN SEE THAT IN MY PICS.<br />
I KNOW THEY’RE ONLY SO SO.<br />
THIS IS ME IN A NUTSHELL. <br />
THIS IS ME AS A CASE OF HEINEKEN. <br />
I AM TRYING TO BECOME AS HAPPY AS I CAN BE.<br />
IT’S WORKING I GUESS. <br />
I WAS IN A LONG MARRIAGE BUT AREN”T THEY ALL. <br />
TO ME, IT WAS VERY SUCCESSFUL FOR A LONG TIME BEFORE IT WENT TO SHIT. <br />
I HAVE 4 BEAUTIFUL CHILDREN.<br />
WELL, THREE. <br />
THEY ARE OF VARIOUS AGES NO MORE THAN MY OWN BUT NO LESS THAN MY BABYSITTER’S.<br />
THEY GIVE ME GREAT JOY.<br />
MY BIRTHDAY IS TOMORROW. <br />
I’M SURE I WILL GET GREAT JOY AGAIN.<br />
I STILL HAVEN’T USED THE GREAT JOY I GOT LAST YEAR.<br />
IT DOESN’T KEEP FOREVER. <br />
I WANT THEM TO THINK THEY’RE DOING SOMETHING RIGHT.<br />
BUT NOW IT IS TIME TO MOVE FORWARD WITH ME. <br />
I AM MOVING FORWARD WITH ME NOW. <br />
STEP BACK, WE, I AND ME, ARE MOVING FORWARD. <br />
STEP BACK I SAID.<br />
<br />
I THINK IF I CAN MAKE IT TO THE FIVE HUNDRED WORD COUNT LIMIT HERE<br />
YOU WILL LOVE ME AND WE WILL FIND IN EACH OTHER COMPANIONSHIP, LOVE<br />
AND PASSION IN AT LEAST ONE DIRECTION AT A TIME. <br />
IF YOU ARE MORE THAN ONE BEAUTIFUL WOMAN OUR ODDS JUST JUMPED.<br />
I AM WRITING THIS IN QUICKSAND BUT TRYING TO KEEP VERY STILL.<br />
IF I SETTLE TOO MUCH I’M FUCKED. <br />
I LOVE TO MAKE OTHER PEOPLE APPEAR HAPPY. <br />
I LOVE TO FORCE OTHER PEOPLE TO LAUGH.<br />
I AM STILL TRYING HARD NOT TO SETTLE.<br />
THERE IS AN ELECTRICAL OUTLET WITH XMAS LIGHTS PLUGGED INTO IT.<br />
I THINK I CAN REACH IT BUT I’M NOT IN GREAT SHAPE.<br />
ONE OF MY RESOLUTIONS IS GETTING TO THE GYM MORE. <br />
I MIGHT ALSO ELECTROCUTE MYSELF, THE QUICKSAND IS WET <br />
FROM LAST NIGHT’S RAIN. <br />
<br />
I LIKE TO THINK. <br />
I BELIEVE THERE ARE TWO HUMAN ACTIVITIES THAT ENCOMPASS ALL FIVE <br />
OF THE SENSES. <br />
I BELIEVE ONE OF THESE ACTIVITIES ENCOMPASSES HUMANS.<br />
I BELIEVE ONE OF THESE ACTIVITIES ENCOMPASSES ALL FIVE TEENS <br />
AT THE SLUMBER PARTY NEXT DOOR. <br />
ONE IS ENJOYING SOME FOOD.<br />
ANOTHER IS ENJOYING SOME WINE. <br />
I CAN WAIT AS LONG AS NECESSARY, AS LONG AS I DON’T BREATHE.<br />
I GREW UP IN KANSAS WHERE THEY RAISE THE TV COMMERCIALS.<br />
I MAKE THINGS FOR A LIVING. <br />
I WISH I HAD MADE SOME SNOWSHOES.<br />
I CAN’T MOVE MY HEAD.<br />
I CAN’T CHECK TO SEE WHERE I AM RELATIVE TO THE FIVE HUNDRED WORD<br />
COUNT LIMIT OR THE TEEN IN THE TEDDY WITH THE WINE.<br />
I AM NOT CURRENTLY MOVING FORWARD WITH ME. <br />
ONE OF MY BEST FRIENDS IS A SUSHI MASTER.<br />
I LOVE TO WATCH GIRLS PLAY SPORTS. <br />
<br />
<b>It really does flash before your eyes, who knew?</b><br />
<br />
I’M SORT OF SORTING MY LIFE OUT. <br />
I’M AIMING FOR BLISS AND MISSING LESS.<br />
I’M ENJOYING MY WORK AS A DOWSER. <br />
I’M EATING OUT IF YOU INSIST.<br />
I’M MAKING OUT MY WILL ON A PIECE OF JUNK MAIL WITH A PEN I FOUND IN MY HAIR.<br />
I’M MAKING OTHERS APPEAR HAPPY. <br />
I’M ENJOYING MY CHILDREN EVEN THOUGH SOME OF THEM ARE ASSHOLES.<br />
I’M COOKING IN MY HEAD.<br />
I’M LAUGHING IN MY HEAD. <br />
I’M LOOKING FOR LOVE IN ANYTHING LEFT. <br />
I’M UP TO MY THIRD RIB AND ACKNOWLEDGING MY AFFECTION FOR ALL LIVING THINGS AND FOR THE THINGS I’LL PROBABLY NEVER DO LIKE THE TEEN IN THE TEDDY WITH THE WINE. <br />
<br />
<b>What’s more important, to be good or to be respirating?</b><br />
<br />
MAYBE IT’S MAKING PEOPLE LAUGH? <br />
MAKING PEOPLE LAUGH AT ALL THE RIGHT MOMENTS?<br />
MAKING PEOPLE LAUGH WHILE COOKING?<br />
LOVING? <br />
BEING A LAME GUITAR PLAYER?<br />
I’M A LAME GUITAR PLAYER AND EVEN WORSE ON BANJO. <br />
BUT I HAVE THE GOOD SENSE TO NEVER PLAY IT UNLESS I’M ALONE OR DROWNING. <br />
MAYBE THIS COUNTS AS DROWNING?<br />
WOULD IT MAKE YOU APPEAR HAPPY OR LAUGH TO ENJOY SOME BANJO?<br />
<br />
<b>The last things to sink</b><br />
<br />
MY DIMPLES. <br />
MY CURLS. <br />
MY LAUGH. <br />
YOUR APPARENT HAPPINESS.<br />
<br />
<b>I already miss my favorite food</b><br />
<br />
I’M A HEDONIST AND ALWAYS ENJOYED THE FREQUENT FLIER MILES. <br />
THIS SUBSET OF QUESTIONS IS ONLY FORCING ME TO RE-ENJOY IT ALL. <br />
<br />
<b>Things I could use to make things</b><br />
<br />
MY CHILDREN IN A CHAIN.<br />
COOKING FOR FRIENDS WHO COULD COME OVER ANYTIME NOW.<br />
LOVE FOR THE RIGHT WOMAN WITH A ROPE.<br />
WATER? NO, NOT WATER.<br />
PASSION FOR THE BANJO THAT WOULD HAVE MADE ME<br />
BRING THE BANGO WITH ME SO THAT I COULD USE THE BANJO<br />
TO CATCH THAT LOW HANGING BRANCH OF THE LINDEN TREE<br />
ABOVE THE OLD COI POND THAT I FILLED WITH SAND BUT <br />
OBVIOUSLY NOT ENOUGH SAND OR I WOULDN’T NEED <br />
THE FUCKING BANJO. (THE LINDEN TREE ATTRACTS BEES. GREAT.) <br />
MUSIC, A SIREN OR ALARM OF SOME SORT.<br />
<br />
<b>I smoked too few of ‘em while I’d got ‘em</b><br />
<br />
I’D STILL PREFER TO BE MAKING MYSELF HAPPY AND OTHERS APPEAR HAPPY.<br />
<br />
<b>On my last and most atypical Friday night</b><br />
<br />
I’M TRYING TO DEFY THE TERM “WEIGHT”. I’M TRYING TO LEARN TO CURSE <br />
IN SPANISH, THE NEW NEIGHBORS ARE FROM SPAIN I THINK, OR MAYBE MADRID. <br />
THE ONE IN THE TEDDY LOOKS SPANISH, ANYWAY. AND THE WINE, NO, I CAN’T<br />
REALLY TELL. MY EYES ARE NEARLY UNDER. I’M STARTING TO FEEL WARM ALL OVER. <br />
THEY SAY IT’S TRUE THAT IT OFTEN HAPPENS THAT WAY, I’M ABLE TO CONFIRM THAT IT IS. <br />
<br />
<b>Rethinking the privacy hedge</b><br />
<br />
I’M HERE! I’M STILL HERE! BANJO, ANYONE? CLOTHESLINE? <br />
<br />
<b>I’m gasping for</b><br />
<br />
A GIRL WHO WANTS A HEINEKEN. <br />
A GAS OR ELECTRIC COMPANY GUY ON THE NIGHT SHIFT.<br />
ANYONE NEAR ME.<br />
A WINE RUN NEXT DOOR.<br />
A LOVE THAT WILL LAST FOREVER, HAPPY AND LAUGHING AND DRY.<br />
<br />
<b>You should rescue me if</b><br />
<br />
YOU WANT TO BE MADE TO APPEAR TO BE HAPPY. <br />
YOU WANT SOMEONE TO FORCE YOU TO LAUGH. <br />
YOU HAVE I.D. THAT SAYS YOU’RE EIGHTEEN AND SOME SPANISH WINE.<br />
YOU KNOW OF AN ALL NIGHT SUSHI BAR OR SOCCER MATCH NEARBY.<br />
<br />
(MECHANICALLY? IS THIS A RITUAL? OR AM I JUST TIRED OUT?)<br />
<br />
I FEEL NIBBLED.<br />
TIME TO SING. <br />
AMAZING GRACE IN PINK. <br />
<br><br>Rick Wigginshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00523692547207125395noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1995235272334810474.post-65511103378058388472011-07-20T06:44:00.002-04:002011-09-18T02:55:14.214-04:00JoyDispleasureAdvertiser<br><br><br />
<b>Seeks Cowfish With 20 Inch Horn</b><br />
<br />
I work as a book. Not so much as an adaptation. <br />
I remember reading once about a beekeeper, he was starving for company.<br />
In Portugal they have no bees. I don’t really mind. <br />
Music is harder than a bee, more porous than a placemat, less well versed<br />
in the art of seduction than you who would like to get to know me<br />
and play me instead of your favorite song. <br />
That’s the one that goes too long<br />
and rhymes with the land<br />
we stole from the dead.<br />
This just got heavy.<br />
I love SPORTS!<br />
<br />
My left hand practices sports regularly.<br />
My right hand likes to travel.<br />
I wear a bit at night.<br />
Not cuz I need it.<br />
<br />
I’m really a goon, I belong to a squad, it keeps me in good shape <br />
and looking frightening enough to have the sort of healthy and long life<br />
they sing about at funerals.<br />
I really like my job.<br />
<br />
My best feature is the eye, the smile, the lean body and luscious<br />
tower array that follows my money wherever it wants me.<br />
<br />
They say it’s coming true, can it? They can’t be original munchkins, can they?<br />
They say I'm elegant. There are too many of them to argue. Can you?<br />
<br />
A mare who has many foals, someone has to clean up the happy messes.<br />
When no one is there a tree falls on the small one. One plus one tree<br />
equals history. I know you, I know who is and isn’t happy. It calls itself<br />
home for the supper. It has the same name. It has nothing else, no one. <br />
<br />
Your name has you. <br />
<br />
Many lack this degree of comfort. <br />
<br />
We attend mass together, especially those <br />
who have good clothes and are content with the brunch. <br />
I enjoy a good god and the freedom of other expressions <br />
from early top forty R & B along with my occupation, freelance <br />
affectioneer. A bloody demonstration in a square and the loss <br />
of breath. A ghost is here and says these are all good comments.<br />
Feel free to agree, the ghost is holding your future. <br />
<br />
I get off work in an hour.<br />
<br><br>Rick Wigginshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00523692547207125395noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1995235272334810474.post-57704105927677080662011-07-14T05:22:00.003-04:002011-07-14T05:27:19.202-04:00SlapTake<br><br><br />
<b>Tear-Open</b><br />
<br />
What can a spirit tell you about a person? <br />
That a thought once lived in the shed on live <br />
mice and retired laboratory monkeys?<br />
That movements happen in the night without <br />
your ponderous socks weighing in with an opinion?<br />
How does grace have anything to do with amazement <br />
in this 1/72 scale ballpark with functioning lights?<br />
If questions cause you to ask yourself questions <br />
I’ll rephrase the question: I didn’t come here<br />
I was brought. I had a tight head, the metal camera <br />
couldn’t contain the edges, the best ones got left lying<br />
on the Kresge’s floor the year before they opened the first <br />
Kmart in Garden City, Michigan. Early sixties, I think. <br />
Same year my first crop came due and the nurses said<br />
“She must be destined for crazy greatness!” <br />
<br />
If you have a facial imperfection that you haven’t mentioned <br />
I’d much prefer you didn’t. <br />
<br />
Now I’ll make a face. This one looks much more like me than I do. <br />
<br />
(sometimes)<br />
<br />
<b>Funka</b><br />
<br />
Did I just catch you thinking something about someone again? <br />
Your layers are beginning to peel away, only the strangled cries <br />
for a slurpy and your plaque that proves an America will remain. <br />
I knew it. And I’ve been trying all along to explore it, like a film. <br />
Jewelry made of actual film, and a teacup labeled “Shatter Me <br />
on your Forehead!” As a student of the unknown my thirst for things <br />
to think about knows some bounds, but after dinner we can<br />
start back at the beginning. The part where you said, “Hey…”. <br />
<br />
I stood with one cowboy boot planted firmly in the Suppurater Saloon <br />
and the other on Obama’s neck that night, that special night. The mall <br />
was practically empty, you could shoot off a gun in there. <br />
<br />
I was frozen, time passed, I was frozen in time, I was frozen in the past, <br />
Obama was frozen in the past, time was frozen in Obama, the mall was<br />
suddenly crawling. <br />
<br />
I swore I would be swifter this time but dinner was all you can eat. <br />
I wanted you but…<i>all you can eat?</i> <br />
<br />
Each endless journey begins with a stumble and a mild sprain. <br />
<br />
<b>Jawfish</b><br />
<br />
I swear I can order for two and you needn’t even be here. <br />
What do you want tapped out? What occasion risen to? <br />
It’s this effing intrinsic ordering thing, do there have to be deeper<br />
meanings? Can’t it all just amount to a poorly written quick-start manual<br />
that takes years to decipher? Like the story I read on here about a fly;<br />
how it ate its family in three acts then rebelled against cannibalism<br />
but only after discovering the all you can eat buffet. <br />
There it is again. <br />
The occasion rises to itself, you just need to be lying under it. <br />
<br />
<b>Joystick</b><br />
<br />
If I'm smiling, I smile. If I’m composed I’m made up of bits. <br />
If a runaway carriage crushes me or at least muddies my bustle<br />
I’ll pirouette to the infirmary. (lots of ballet classes when I was young)<br />
It isn't at all my real body. The traffic that drove the events, that was.<br />
Something in your pants is vibrating now. People also tell me I look <br />
younger than almost everything that’s ever lived. I never know what to do <br />
with my age. Never know what to do with a Sunday and no credit. <br />
Maybe treeless light. Maybe a deafened mountain. <br />
Maybe just another wondermeal. <br />
<br />
Or a light in the sky at the end of the tunnel that is the sky. <br />
Feelings, reading, water, air…just ideas. Endlessly better when eating. <br />
The balance of a strike when you wanted a spare. <br />
The universe, as such, sees a movie then goes bodysurfing.<br />
<br><br>Rick Wigginshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00523692547207125395noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1995235272334810474.post-82546592451173565752011-07-14T04:27:00.000-04:002011-07-14T04:27:43.585-04:00OPPOSITE INSTRUMENTS<br><br><br />
In this case you are not represented by the brick.<br />
<br />
the architect takes the shape of a creature, one<br />
of my birthing hips, say, then drinks heavily and mourns<br />
his lost opportunities as a pawn of the administration. <br />
<br />
In the morning a building has appeared. Municipal building,<br />
bureau of statistics, vegan juice bar, structures of enduring <br />
use and importance are brought into being in the shadow<br />
of a mylar kite in the shape of a fantastic creature, my other hip. <br />
<br />
I saw this movie once where the guy said something and then<br />
we left and the following decade is a complete blank. <br />
A lot of fear, I assume, and erections having little to do<br />
with the openness and trust of a two year old who’s already<br />
totally screwed. <br />
<br />
I won’t stand over you. I won’t make you uncomfortable. <br />
I’ll just make more mistakes. I’ll keep making mistakes<br />
until you give me something I can waste in a small inelegant<br />
structure. Pure function. No release. A hose. <br />
<br />
So…I scared you with my sweetness and utter lack of guile<br />
and my perfectly rendered copy of Fragonard’s Happy Accidents<br />
of the Swing. The man in the bushes is me, the husband blind<br />
to the man is me, the cupid observing a separate scene involving <br />
a kiss on the infield of a demolition derby in the next meadow<br />
over is me. We are, each of us, unaware of the other. We are <br />
also unaware of you. The man will pretend to admire your pussy, <br />
your shoe will strike the cupid in the eye and blind him, the cherubs<br />
behind you will catch the swing causing you to fall and be rendered<br />
lame, like a perfectly copied painting of a bucolic scene at dusk. <br />
Only the husband, already dead, will survive. <br />
<br />
(The grandstand structure was designed by the firm of Barren, Risk and <br />
Autogiro, Architects.) <br />
<br />
The grand prize was won by a 1957 Chrysler Imperial driven by Don Basile <br />
or possibly Larry Mendelsohn. The fire rendered any positive identification <br />
impossible. Pinky Tuscadero was called in as an expert consultant but was <br />
herself, coincidentally, killed on the same day in a swing accident. Police <br />
questioned several fireflies, a duck with mild apnea, and the artist Gabriel <br />
Francois Doyen. No one was charged, all were released and the helicopter <br />
revolutionized modern aviation and modern warfare. <br />
<br />
The brick represented the serum. Nothing a week in the country can’t unfix. <br />
<br><br>Rick Wigginshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00523692547207125395noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1995235272334810474.post-90430891176908565392011-07-10T04:01:00.004-04:002011-07-10T04:27:09.891-04:00LemonyTechnicalities<br><br><br />
<b>The Randomized Dream of the Selfless</b><br />
<br />
I lead a flock of slipper sheep. That’s sheep that are raised for slippers. <br />
I absolutely love slippers. I get to work at about midnight and leave <br />
at about midnight the next day. I think slippers are brilliant when the sun<br />
<br />
catches their edges as they’re being skinned. I should clarify here, slippers<br />
are what we call the sheep, not just what we call what’s made from them. <br />
It’s a way we have of making the whole process more creative. <br />
<br />
I love things that remind me of slippers, like slipperiness – makes me think<br />
of my old Slip-n-Slide from the backyard when we lived just outside <br />
the Two-Headed Veal Hyperpiesia Atoll sublingual testing ground. <br />
<br />
Some of my slippers you can spin-dry! I think that is my method of choice.<br />
Outside lines are too untrustworthy. Drying anything chemically is kinda risky.<br />
My family came from the ocean. <br />
<br />
Certain days are more wordy than others, but fumigating a teeterboard<br />
is always fun! Then you mince the meat of the sheered slipper and mix<br />
it with some split-pea soup. It’s a legitimate source of protein. <br />
<br />
I pick up piecework as a surrogate pigherd on a competing sandal ranch. <br />
They feed primarily on eucalyptus and my leg is killing me. I lost a chunk <br />
to a horticulturist with a grudge. Plants are useless unless fed to something. <br />
<br />
There’s an audible secondary band, it’s playing the same anthem<br />
as the primary band at the same time. The orchestration and tempo<br />
are indistinguishable. One of the trombonists has a very peculiar dick. <br />
<br />
Where are all the men who love to sleep on cots? We smile and pretend <br />
we have cerebral palsy, but smart isn’t everything. In my email persona I am <br />
a sensual transvestite with a custom footwear folder. Life holds many challenges. <br />
<br />
I am dominantly candid, uncontrived, love to say boo to spooks, the match is always<br />
half unlit, my days are far safer for you than your nights are for my amateur safari, <br />
but I’m fitter than the others you’ve messaged here, and ready to go co-marauding.<br />
<br />
<b>Note to Bomb: Hold Off</b><br />
<br />
Until you see the whites of my telescopic neck ... my spice … my mosey …<br />
my glass when it’s bracelets ... the lipstick tidal waves in my water … <br />
my guarantee of erections … me eating slugs and keeping oncoming …<br />
how skimpy my jumpsuit looks in mirrors …<br />
<br />
How I formed an opinion once out of nothing but SCUD components …<br />
they came on the pretense of peace but were only here to starve<br />
Jupiter and funnel him through an unwanted manhood … if you’re a <br />
spilled out mummy with temporary tattoos of annotations to<br />
the Spoilables by Rex Beach you can energize that veggie lasagna<br />
and blast off into my grapefruit … I say this with all deliberate speech<br />
and a positive outcropping on my “front porch”. <br />
<br />
<b>The Addition of Something New</b><br />
<br />
Here is where I tick, down there is where I’m focally slick,<br />
the only other spot you need to know is the one that makes me mew <br />
ten times more than I normally mew, in which instance ... hmmm ...<br />
+ attending hangings with friends<br />
+ you (laterally)<br />
+ a knot tied one & one sixteenth inches from the base of the shaft<br />
+ my mistaken borderline identity<br />
+ teatime on deck<br />
+ a good gin and stegosaurus & Jerry Lewis on Ativan (does that count as a number?)<br />
<br />
<b>Know This, One of Us Should:</b><br />
<br />
it’s one minute till my terribly excited superpowers, <br />
if I steel myself against vice I will be thwarted, <br />
if what I flay I call a “slant” metonymically I’m already out of Prozac. <br />
1 in 8 terrorists are discrete and have families to go to games with <br />
and spread out after a long day ... <br />
<br />
I’m dictating this, tied to one end of my sketch, a misquotation weighting <br />
the other like a tea-strainer filled with radioactive perfect dates, glowing <br />
as stolidly as are the nearly totally blind architects & their thrift in assessing <br />
the clustered junk of the former utopia planners & builders forcibly offering me <br />
up to the king of the slipper warlords in a sort of sacrificial bar-b-cue.<br />
<br />
This has gotten messier than flypaper on souvenir testes. I know. <br />
<br />
And the ocean my family abandoned at the height of the market<br />
bottoming out is now being renovated as a foot massage parlor for sarah <br />
paleontology. In the locked case she has 2 tv shows, in a later revision more<br />
like 20 million …<br />
<br />
I’ll be the recapitation of you with my topically glancing energy bark, yes<br />
it’s another superpower, if I centralize my spirit I can amortize your cold rods, <br />
whatever you get you don’t owe me anything but the rest of your life in bed. <br />
What they mean when they say holystone I mean when I say epic head, <br />
a pure pluperfect hex, as in “he had done it when I came.” a hen with external eggs. <br />
<br />
The best brunch in Arcadia<br />
<br />
where on Wednesday nights at 3am families go hungry free. Ach mein schatz <br />
you’re missing it, the marzipan replica of Zion is too masculine at the crux <br />
to be a replenishable waterbird. The hearing of my heart’s plea can be widened,<br />
wide as linen is cruel to cheeks, but a thin pelt of ambulance money, the morning<br />
the night became itself…I think all this me just gave me a great concussion. <br />
Where in the garden, darling?<br />
Obediently boring into your deeper layer. Conveniently located near an arch. <br />
You might detect a trance, might be a meager part for a walk-on semi-precious <br />
gem with the megaphone removed. Plant this white Hydrangea. Build it a fork<br />
of acid. Sit cross-legged at the feet of the pitted plum tree. Stone anyone who plays<br />
a lute. This is not the way these deaths are supposed to be celebrated. With ducks. <br />
<br />
I am no horticulturist, but I am a horticulturist. <br />
The pom-poms will be blue as my eyes, <br />
but only if you have the patience and acid<br />
enough for the spring. The rest is immanent <br />
and is killing me again, but softly this time.<br />
<br />
<b>What I Was Observed At</b><br />
<br />
Up in a tree with night vision sights<br />
Miserable and too ghastly for your formalities<br />
Seeing The Thundering Fleas<br />
It begins at a slow pace, then gadgetry spools it up<br />
I will never be Finnish for you<br />
But you may rebreak my teenage glass<br />
You’ll find directions to the canopy on my outer lobby<br />
Crying at your recital, made subtle by unexpected news<br />
Rethinking beef as a form of communication<br />
Getting the sweats right after years of registration<br />
<br />
<b>I’m Pointing to it Now</b><br />
<br />
let's stimulate joylessly …<br />
let’s find the threshold too suddenly ...<br />
let's splice a little girl to a fissure ...<br />
let's pierce my bush and watch my stagger ...<br />
let’s knock back a dozen in the pitch-black ...<br />
let's smack you on the pinpoint until fully compatible ...<br />
let’s flag girls down during their first misconstrual …<br />
let’s wound and medicate …<br />
skid then throb?<br />
<br><br>Rick Wigginshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00523692547207125395noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1995235272334810474.post-3635956222644351092011-07-03T05:40:00.000-04:002011-07-03T05:40:04.018-04:00LifeSizedMusk<br><br><br />
<b>My Inoculation With the Sand</b><br />
<br />
I am unlike anyone I have ever met...in a good way. <br />
<br />
Although insensate ladies find me fatuously primitive…in a good way. <br />
<br />
My butt is far stronger than you can possibly imagine...but try. <br />
<br />
It’s seemingly me, ostensibly one of the last of the "Singing Acorns", <br />
presumably hiding a tiny cone of pure NASCAR in a spider cage <br />
under my breastbone. <br />
<br />
I’ll keep it "evil" like one of those white blues songs, to keep things <br />
uninteresting enough to blunt your being mature and serious, but seriously,<br />
what heart still runs at an average of 8-year-olds per minute and displays<br />
this kind of iron? Who likes to pull on your “pigtails” with his bridgework? <br />
<br />
Who is very open-heart, upper-deck, full-frontal, and still honed like your first<br />
really monster Bowie knife? You may see my gist but the reverse is something you <br />
can’t escape without violating my right to violate your small parts. Earn me into <br />
your private soul facility, I’ll clean up on the back end. <br />
<br />
I carry my will wherever I go and revise it depending. <br />
<br />
Like the proverb says, “Shit man, get off my back!” <br />
<br />
But even if I love you like the Russian hooker of my dreams you still have the right<br />
to do what I want you to. That’s the cross I have to bury, the rest I can burn <br />
in the hesitation of a chemical fire poised at the point of a Jiffy Pop life or death decision. <br />
There’s a line in the sand, you are the sand, you need to call and cancel your service,<br />
with me here now it’s redundant. <br />
<br />
I'm not peeing in everyone's cup, but if you’re the tea type take that bellywash and sell it<br />
to the rednecks. I don’t want to know you, I have a TV for that. <br />
<br />
Still, if you have the guts, then take a sip... I think you'll like it. There’s always <br />
that look of realization just before Mister Deerhoof comes out to forage. <br />
<br />
I am not dry, you are, I am good to go, you’re wilting, I am the fable of the dog<br />
who sewed his own reflection into a small pox quilt for the so-called “guys” on Bourbon <br />
below St. Ann. Like Chelsea with the fronts inverted to keep you staring at flowers. <br />
<br />
<b>What Am’n’t I doing with my life?</b><br />
<br />
Spending my days (and odd numbered nights) <br />
expressing myself like The Guns of Navarone. <br />
<br />
In real estate we have the expression: <br />
while figuring out what kind of waiter you want<br />
let yourself be served by the waiter you get. <br />
<br />
That’s the kind of troubadour I wanted <br />
to be when I grew up. Now I want to suck <br />
the world out of the pages of Maxim <br />
Arm Chair General <br />
Reptiles USA <br />
Fire & Movement<br />
SWINDLE<br />
Cigar Aficionado<br />
XLR8R<br />
The Christadelphian<br />
Christian Century<br />
Christian Music Monthly<br />
Seed<br />
Star Wars Insider<br />
Blood & Thunder<br />
Field & Stream<br />
Open Minds UFO <br />
Buck <br />
Loaded <br />
Nuts<br />
Pinstripe<br />
Shave<br />
GIANT<br />
Barely Legal<br />
Over 40<br />
Perfect 10<br />
Arena<br />
<br />
Each in its own way makes me wonder if I am more of a writer-as-creative-type than writer-as-jerking-clavicle-twitch. <br />
<br />
<b>I’m a Startling Contrast With A Microphone and Corn Chips</b><br />
<br />
I run nine buildings with ten tenants. One of them is named Ryan. <br />
I don’t always share that story but I believe, like Gandhi, in an open book. <br />
<br />
I can climb a mature blue spruce and come out at the top skinned with intact <br />
memories. Socially, I am into laying blame and not only in a kidding way.<br />
<br />
There’s a big one coming from the East, I can feel the Thunder in four <br />
of my testicles. When I see something fine I sire it! <br />
<br />
I AM miserable.<br />
Don't gibe with me even as a tease, your steak can be returned. <br />
But try training me and you get the ham spread. <br />
Based on my experience, if I am jilted I will thresh you. <br />
If not I will thresh you flawlessly.<br />
<br />
<b>The Fireproof Inflatable Nurse I’m Totally Genuflecting To</b><br />
<br />
It's easy to be a complete f-up on a site like this and blow the chance at a roofie tryst with the hole in your cogitative trance -- I enjoy it breezy or flat and a little abrasive -- but at the end of the day, what I really want is a bond that transcends the limitations of one partner suffering a massive stroke and global aphasia, being rendered able to utter only one schizophrenic syllable: SMUM, when he had formerly been a highly successful author of children’s erotica. The devotion of the woman who records his work in this state, herself a noteworthy writer of books of poetry of house pets, for the entirety of his final fourteen months, is to me the most beautiful representation of something that approximates love. <br />
<br />
... And I'm willing to wait for you to come.<br />
<br><br>Rick Wigginshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00523692547207125395noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1995235272334810474.post-83670136467030473882011-06-26T05:41:00.000-04:002011-06-26T05:41:48.648-04:00YogurtSubstitute<br><br><br />
“The head is the hardest lesson. Giving and receiving.<br />
It works overtime to confound, to present you with conflicting but<br />
equally plausible approaches. Like how many licks make a system<br />
of owls? Fewer than its teeth, greater than its barnacled scooter.”<br />
~Sycamore Jimmy<br />
<br />
<b>My Arrhythmic Menstrual Spellbinder Test (excerpt)</b><br />
<br />
I am unwittingly pledged.<br />
You are a vintage coupe’.<br />
We are convoluted, adducing <br />
chickens and porcupine jewels. <br />
<br />
I am eternally uptown.<br />
You are a draft.<br />
We are bored seeing, see <br />
for yourself. <br />
<br />
I am bureaucracy for no extra charge.<br />
You are into bug dancers.<br />
We are that hinge, thudding but alas <br />
no answers. <br />
<br />
I am enchantingly retrograde. <br />
You are a security guard at Target. <br />
We form a sarcophagus that is both<br />
ardent and knows what makes this tic. <br />
<br />
I am the CEO of a major Catholicism.<br />
You do jokes for change. <br />
We are a cozily monstrous butte<br />
who's subsidy depends on a guy called Cliff.<br />
<br />
I am spherically huddled.<br />
You do the paid jerk. <br />
We are a superb young phylum, jouncing <br />
her girlish brand as if the drums are watching.<br />
<br />
I am near you.<br />
You are a near life experience. <br />
We both require that your openhanded spraying <br />
provenance be simple subtraction.<br />
<br />
Let god blurt out the rest. <br />
<br />
<b>Hey, what am <i>I</i> doing with my life?</b><br />
<br />
I am acid of Osiris, refutation <br />
of the last election, of enchilada <br />
entire, the stylist of the hydra, foot-<br />
notes echo where my soul was optional, <br />
I wear mesh to be a lessening unguent, <br />
I am your personal policy sanitizer <br />
dispenser, flippered and thick <br />
with the itch of humankindness. <br />
<br />
Thirsty was fun, thrifty was insufficient, thirty was an acceptable insult. <br />
My ring could fetch the paper and remove it from your windpipe once I’d had you. <br />
This thing we could have is a giant standing next to a fridge. <br />
The test hasn’t started yet. <br />
I’m learning martial arts, I’ve always loved working with objects. <br />
Is it predictable to test someone for diseases from other dimensions? <br />
This is where I inevitably infatuate. <br />
To be a chef in a house of whirligigs. <br />
<br />
<b>Many are Called, Most are Booty</b><br />
<br />
If I could spit you out just, say, half the time, I would<br />
gladly stay wide open for you and find the jewels <br />
in the toothpaste between periods. <br />
If only it came from your soul. <br />
I would not get too skeeved out or, for example, return<br />
it to the source. <br />
Greedy, me? I swear I’ve left more wilderness<br />
in the wild than otherwise. <br />
I’m rich with the stolen toothpaste of a compassion<br />
based on bicycle parts reassembled into a sort of kinetic<br />
hurricane monument. There’s nothing left to be found. <br />
Differences are what make us different, similarities <br />
are what make us Easter eggs, but I will not leave you<br />
until I lay all the gamblers in Atlantic City and set aside <br />
a grateful stipend for your bout with the big FO.<br />
if you let me in before they get here I will give you a piece<br />
of the Avalon. <br />
<br />
<b>What’s More Compelling Than My Melanoma Sour Apple Lipstick?</b><br />
<br />
My jerkwater threshold. <br />
<br />
<b>You’ve Only Made One Mistake Fewer than the Sioux, and Yet You’re Leading Your Division.</b><br />
<br />
The gizmo. <br />
I will have it if it kills you. I only know how to tell stories, and even they’re not good. <br />
And at the end of my arm I keep a device to keep your attention fixed on my inattention.<br />
It’s a full blown spiritual quest, it stands alongside the freeway and lights up cool at night. <br />
The old couple there is teaching a course in miracles.<br />
<br />
<b>The Geopolitics are Starving for a Kibosh</b><br />
<br />
Flameflower again. <br />
He was the one, no question, still. And he actually said, <br />
“I slaughter that I might one day demilitarize, thematically.” <br />
First you garble, then it’s spring, then you taste the Latinate. <br />
Get wise and tilt.<br />
<br />
<b>Little Further Issue</b><br />
<br />
At first the owl was made of lace. <br />
Then butterfly in straightjacket. <br />
Now I can’t call up anything but normalcy. <br />
if you flag down a whale in a rage the skid marks<br />
will last until Monday, latest. <br />
When I aim my mouth monaurally it becomes<br />
telephonic. But metered without race interference<br />
it gets up a head of impossible change. <br />
Posed thusly I am steadying.<br />
Thusly and I am your journey laid flat.<br />
The fish you do like you do your sleeves, playful <br />
in the arcing light of the microwave.<br />
That’s your terabyte of history, this is me not interested. <br />
I tried a gobo on my chronic sleep, but it left me visibly spluttering.<br />
How I know that my life will be blessed.<br />
<br><br>Rick Wigginshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00523692547207125395noreply@blogger.com